An Apology To The One

An Apology To The One

I am so sorry.
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Judging by the title, I am assuming you are not 'the one' I am talking about. Unless you are my boyfriend in which case, yes you are. This article is not written for views, controversy, or shares. It is written for one person only.

I don't always voice my opinions in the best way. Let me rephrase, I absolutely do voice my opinions; just, lately, not in the kindest way possible. I have always had very strong opinions and was a leader in many aspects of my life. I was able to say what I thought mindfully.

But recently, if any of you had read my first published article, it was about how my boyfriend and I were hit by a drunk driver. My boyfriend walked away from the accident with nothing but a scar on his elbow. I, on the other hand, got most of the impact and still, many months later, am in the doctor's office constantly with no concrete answers or treatment plans. Now don't get me wrong I am glad it was myself and not him. I would not wish that upon anyone, especially someone that I love. However, he was able to continue his research over the summer whilst I had to decline my internship. He was able to have a life. And over the months I had built up a lot of subconscious anger towards him. I couldn't (and still can't really) understand why I got most of the impact and he was able to walk away. And I still can't quite grasp why I have this anger. I know consciously that I would be heartbroken if the situation was reversed and he was in this much pain, but I can't help feel jealousy that he didn't have to drop classes, was able to take summer classes, and work in a physics lab over the summer. As well as do college student normalities like be able to walk to class without his leg giving out.

As I know that I have these feelings, I did not try to acknowledge them, as they are conflicting. But I realize that I have been acknowledging them by taking it out on the one I love. For months he was helping me walk, accompanying me to doctor's appointments and even helping me bathe. But I have been treating him poorly due to my subconscious anger. This only came to light when he broke up with me a few days ago. Thankfully, he accepted my initial apology and we are as good as new. But I can't help but feel that he deserves more. A bigger apology. So here it is.

I won't say your name mostly because I am not sure you will be comfortable with it. But thank you for the last four months. Helping me recover and heal. And thank you even more for the past two years. I couldn't have gotten through the first half of college without you. I apologize from the bottom of my heart for how I have spoken to you lately. You deserve better. And I am working on giving you a better version of myself. You are the one, and I won't lose you. I love you.

Cover Image Credit: Ryan Kuna

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To My Boyfriend's Mom

He loves you more than you could ever imagine...
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Without you, there would not be a him, so first things first, thank you.

1. Thank you for teaching him to love a woman the right way, to put God first, and YOU before me always, the respect he shows you is so attractive, and you deserve it.

He talks about you like you hung the moon, I don't doubt for a second that he will be an amazing father one day, I owe all of that to you.

2. Thank you for giving me a chance, learning to love me when you knew your son was doing the same.

I can't speak for my own first impressions, but hopefully mine was not THAT bad...when we both slapped him on the arms for his rude remark at the same time, I knew our relationship was already blossoming.

SEE ALSO: Finding A Husband In College

3. Thank you for every meal you have ever purchased me.

And chocolate, and candy...you know just as well as your son does that food is the way to my heart. Especially Taco Bell and cheesecake ;)

4. Thank you for your advice, suggestions, and opinions...and asking for mine

Whether it's telling me to slap him for being a smart a$$, or you're asking me about color swabs for your kitchen makeover, you come to me as if I am your own, and I am so honored to give you my own input.

5. Thank you for including me

You never fail to leave a spot for me, and I love family dinners/outings with you guys just as much as I love my own!

6. Thank you for teaching your son to never give up, and that if he does it is only to better himself, or it's the only choice he has left.

He is so focused on his future, he wants the best for himself, and he is constantly reminding me that these are things that YOU taught him, you deserve to be so proud.

7. Thank you for letting him love my family, and allowing me to love yours.

He is so loyal and loving to my family, and I don't even have to ask myself why because I see him with you and yours. Thank you for letting us double up on holidays when we can, and making sure we get the most out of our time with you!

8. Thank you for being his best friend.

I think of him as mine too, but I couldn't think of a better person to also hold that title, you know him better than anyone else and you always will.

9. Thank you for teaching him how to treat a woman

He is constantly telling me "You sound like my mother." Thankfully earlier in our relationship, he told me that the woman he wants to be with, should do just that. He always tells people who try, "No, no one calls me by my full name except my mom and my girlfriend."

10. Thank you for your honesty

We all know that he and I can drive you crazy sometimes, thank you for telling us like it is, and making sure we know you still love us anyways.

SEE ALSO: 8 Tiny Lies Every Young Woman Has Told Their Best Friend

11. Thank you for teaching him to work as hard as possible in anything and everything he does.

I have never met anyone with such a desire for success, he and I are constantly discussing how we can better our futures, and I know exactly where his drive comes from.

12. Thank you for teaching him to clean up after himself

Even though sometimes, it takes him a minute to do so.

13. Thank you for teaching him how to love, and letting him love me.

I have never felt so loved by a man, probably because anyone else who came into my life was just a boy. Thank you for your unconditional love for him, he is your entire heart and that is so easy to see, I am happy to share his with you.

You and I both know that even years from now we will both occasionally probably be closing the fridge that he left open, cleaning the crumbs he dropped, demanding he take a shower after playing soccer, or reminding him 20 times about plans we made weeks ago, we both share such a great love for such an amazing man. I could never be more thankful that you brought forth into this world such a comforting, supportive, protective, steadfast, driven, handsome, and hilarious guy. Thank you for everything you do for him, for me, and for us, I love you a lot!

Cover Image Credit: casey

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6 Ways For Men To Understand Women

The introduction. Let's face it, there's WAY more than 6.

JordynL
JordynL
704
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We know we're confusing, but hopefully this helps you understand us a little better.

1. "I have nothing to wear"

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We realize that we have a ton of clothes in our closets to choose from. We know that some things are super similar. We know that there are some things we wear all the time and other things that we NEVER wear. Regardless of the Go-Tos or "I'm saving this for a 'special occasion'" (which will probably never happen), there's always an excuse. When we say we have nothing to wear, it means that we don't have anything that we WANT to wear.

This contributes to us taking SO long to get ready. Whether it's a date, a night out with the girls, hanging out with a group, or just another Tuesday, we never have anything to wear. We try to dress to match our mood, but that's still not a guarantee. It never is. If we try something on, thinking that it'll work, there's always something wrong with it SO it goes in the reject pile. As the pile grows, we reach the "I have nothing to wear" stage.

And just to make things more complicated and annoying, we go back to the first outfit we tried on and call it good -OR resort to the Go-Tos that we wear WAY too much- (at least I normally do). We waste all that time and effort and there's usually no way to get around it.

2. Periods

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Guys, let me explain to you how a period works.

Every month, our Uterus starts decorating a nursery. "Just wanted to let you know I have everything prepared for the baby! The nursery looks great and I picked out this pretty wallpaper and I'm gonna read stories to it every night!"

Then we come around and say "Oh.. There's not going to be a baby this month.."

Uterus: ......

Us: "Oh god, please no"

Uterus: .... *trashes everything* *rips off the wallpaper* *screams like an angry baboon*

THIS gentlemen, is what we have to go through. Every time we get a cramp, it's basically our uterus stabbing us with broken pieces of the crib and twisting it. This is why we double over. This is why some (maybe most) women cry during their periods. Our uterus throws a freaking temper tantrum when we don't get pregnant.

By the time the uterus gets tired and forgives us, it goes back to setting up a new nursery with upmost excitement. And when we don't get pregnant, the cycle repeats.

Wanna know what to do? Don't make us do anything. Pamper us. Most women like to eat chocolate, so do that (for some reason, that doesn't work for me, but oh well). Have the heating pad ready to go. Ice cream. Even while we look disgusting, reassure us. The uterus' temper tantrum makes us question everything so be ready for that.

But God help you if you say the wrong thing. Most of the time, we don't know what that wrong thing will be, so tread lightly. Just do NOT say ANYTHING about PMSing. Our uterus will hear that and give us some of that hateful energy to rip you apart.

You have been warned.

3. Unsolicited dick pics

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Just don't. Despite what you think, they are NOT aesthetically pleasing.

When a girl actually asks for them and/or agrees to swap nudes, that's the only time it's okay. But if they're anything like me, the pictures still won't do anything for them. I guess it's to make y'all feel wanted and appreciated? I don't know.

If you send unsolicited dick pics, there's a pretty good chance that her girlfriends will see the pictures so be warned.

4. Hoodie Theft

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Sorry guys, there's no way to get around this one. If your girl takes your hoodie, you probably won't get it back.

And if you try to out-smart us by getting two of the exact same hoodie so both of us have one, that won't work either. You foolish mortals think we won't take the second-twinning hoodie too? HA.

5. You: "Where do you want to eat?' Her: "I don't know"

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I HAVE YOUR SOLUTION.

Instead of asking your girl where she wants to eat, MAKE HER GUESS where you're taking her. Her first guess is where y'all are going.

The code has been cracked and most girls don't even realize this sneaky trick (unless they've seen the Twitter meme).

6. The silent treatment

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Honestly... when we're giving you the silent treatment, USUALLY it's because we want you to figure out what you did wrong for yourselves. But it makes this difficult because sometimes we don't even know the reason. Stupid? I know. But we're girls. What do you expect?

We're waiting for you to come up with a solution to whatever problem we think you caused. Because we're right. Even when we're wrong, we're right.

You've probably found with personal experience that you've always found a way to screw it up and you don't even know how. She freaks out for almost no reason and usually never shares why she's so pissed off.

If you don't wanna take the chance on finding the solution because of even the slightest fear of making it worse SOMEHOW, just chill. Spend time with her, don't do anything stupid on your phone, don't play games online with the guys- just spend time with her. It'll let her know that even though she's freaking out for probably no reason, that you still care. Because what'll happen if you leave? "OH SO YOU'RE JUST GONNA GET UP AND LEAVE?"

You guys are honestly in a lose-lose situation and I feel for y'all so much. If you know her well enough to leave and let her calm down, then go for it- at your own risk. Just handle the situation calmly and be like "if you need anything, just call or text me. I'll be there."

DO NOT TELL HER TO CALM DOWN, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

Just give her space SOMEHOW and let her chill. She'll more than likely be over it the next day.

I know this whole thing is giving you mixed messages on what to do, but honestly we don't really know what we want you guys to do, so there you go.

This may help, this may not, but it's a decent start. :)

JordynL
JordynL

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