You told me you loved me no matter what.
You told me you would love me no matter what, even though I dealt with mental illnesses. You loved me through my hardest times. You were my biggest supporter and you made that known to me for several reasons I like to believe. You told me I wasn't crazy when I told you I was. You kissed my scars and loved parts of me that I will never, ever love.
However, all of this changed one night. You did think I was truly crazy. You lied to me the whole time and that is heart-wrenching. You didn't love me. You didn't understand my mental illnesses. You ended up being someone you and I both thought you'd never be.
You told me things and made me believe them when I should never have... One being that you loved me despite my mental illnesses. People who love each other don't turn backs on one another in a time when one desperately needs the other, but that's what you did to me. I was hurting. I was in pain. I was broken. You made it seem like you would always be there, but you never came back.
My scars. You told me I shouldn't be ashamed of them. I bet now you're ashamed you were ever with a girl like me who has scars. You kissed them and reassured me that you understood. Then you let me go so easily with no pain whatsoever. My scars now have lips that tell lies imprinted on them. I thought you understood.
I wasn't always happy. You never forced me to be. You always tried to just make me smile. Then all of that was gone. You didn't care to make me smile or try to make me happy. You knew I was drowning in a depression and you cared about that at one point. Then just one day you stopped. You didn't care I was unhappy, sad, or depressed. You made it seem like you would be there for me always to help, but I guess you just really didn't understand.
I always worried. You helped me though. You helped me through my panic attacks and worries. You told me I wouldn't die when I thought I was. You told me everything would be okay, when in reality things would never be okay because you truly didn't understand. Night after night I struggled to be on my own and get through the night without panicking. You didn't truly understand like you said.
I don't think you're a bad person for not understanding me and my mental illnesses. You just turned out to be someone you said you'd never be and someone who I thought you would never be.