To The Fathers Who Left Their Children Behind

To The Fathers Who Left Their Children Behind

I don't want to hear your excuse. I already know it's pathetic.

It takes a lot out of me each day to try to understand why someone would create a human being they will never take care of. What an exhausting thought. Even if you find yourself in this situation and think it's the biggest mistake of your life, you still have to do something about it. Whatever happened to the saying, "You've made your bed, and now you must sleep in it"? You shouldn't get to just walk away from your child and pretend like that part of your life never happened. You shouldn't get to damage someone before they even know they could be broken. It shouldn't work that way.

Having a child should be your biggest accomplishment. There is now something on this planet that is half of you and half of someone else. That's supposed to be beautiful. You're supposed to love watching that child grow up. You're supposed to care for them and support them so they grow into an amazing adult. You're supposed to feel proud. You're supposed to be a role model for them. You're supposed to be there.

But you weren't.

Just in case you forgot, there's still a child (maybe even an adult now) on this planet whom you've hurt tremendously with your own selfish decisions. There isn't a problem that exists that can't be fixed -- it just comes down to the amount of effort you decide to put into it. If you don't feel horrible about leaving your child, you should. If this post sounds angry to you, it is. I'm sick of hearing about so many wonderful people who either never got a chance to meet their father, were left by their father at a young age, or had a father who decided to remove them from his life as soon as he stopped paying child support. You have no idea what you're missing out on. And whatever your excuse is to not be in the life of your child, I don't want to hear it. I already know it's pathetic.

I hope that you realize what you have done. I hope that you take the time to seek out a real dad and ask them about the joys of parenthood. I hope that they tell you that it's the best and worst thing they've ever experienced, but also remind you that you're missing out on it because they wouldn't change it for the world. I hope that someone else has taken your child under their wing and showed them what fatherly love feels like. I hope that they never suffered because of you. And I hope that you can live with your decision at the end of the day.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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To The Parent Who Chose Addiction

Thank you for giving me a stronger bond with our family.


When I was younger I resented you, I hated every ounce of you, and I used to question why God would give me a parent like you. Not now. Now I see the beauty and the blessings behind having an addict for a parent. If you're reading this, it isn't meant to hurt you, but rather to thank you.

Thank you for choosing your addiction over me.

Throughout my life, you have always chosen the addiction over my programs, my swim meets or even a simple movie night. You joke about it now or act as if I never questioned if you would wake up the next morning from your pill and alcohol-induced sleep, but I thank you for this. I thank you because I gained a relationship with God. The amount of time I spent praying for you strengthened our relationship in ways I could never explain.

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Thank you for giving me a stronger bond with our family.

The amount of hurt and disappointment our family has gone through has brought us closer together. I have a relationship with Nanny and Pop that would never be as strong as it is today if you had been in the picture from day one. That in itself is a blessing.

Thank you for showing me how to love.

From your absence, I have learned how to love unconditionally. I want you to know that even though you weren't here, I love you most of all. No matter the amount of heartbreak, tears, and pain I've felt, you will always be my greatest love.

Thank you for making me strong.

Thank you for leaving and for showing me how to be independent. From you, I have learned that I do not need anyone else to prove to me that I am worthy of being loved. From you, I have learned that life is always hard, but you shouldn't give into the things that make you feel good for a short while, but should search for the real happiness in life.

Most of all, thank you for showing me how to turn my hurt into motivation.

I have learned that the cycle of addiction is not something that will continue into my life. You have hurt me more than anyone, but through that hurt, I have pushed myself to become the best version of myself.

Thank you for choosing the addiction over me because you've made me stronger, wiser, and loving than I ever could've been before.

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