Dear Best Friend,

I’ll never forget when you called me in the early morning when I was half awake with this excited hesitance wavering in and out of your voice. As you and I both know, hesitance is not quite a characteristic of yours; so when I heard your slight vocal pauses followed by giggles and felt your uncomfortable smiles through the phone, I was about to book a plane to Florida and pack either diapers or some shovels, because I was convinced you’d killed somebody or were pregnant.

After plenty of reassurance that I will always love you no matter what, whether you are a murderer, pregnant, or a pregnant murderer, you finally took a deep breath and let me have it; “I got married last night…”

The sound that instantaneously escaped from deep inside of my abdomen and my soul was not human, but an utter manifestation of complete fear and ‘oh crap.’ I almost asked “to who?” because you had only been dating this new guy for a month, and you spilled to me about him two extremely short weeks ago. “Well, the Florida heat finally got to her.” I thought; and like every other moment, I wished you were not so far away.

I questioned your sanity for only an instant. Let me be honest, when you told me that you both had gotten married in onesies with rhyming vows, I questioned your sanity and sobriety for only an instant.

“Were you drunk?” You were not.

Best Friend, I am fully aware of your spontaneity, and it is truly one of the reasons why I love you. You add spice to my life, and you have this way of reminding me to live life to the fullest, because no one gets out alive anyway. But you had to go and get married? If there is one thing that you are, it is sure of yourself. You were sure of getting those huge tattoos of colorful succulents across your leg, and you were even surer that you loved this man that had come into your life. The marriage license was signed, the bride and groom had kissed, and the ordained minister had left; needless to say, the deed had been done. I asked you if you were okay and you said yes, and I had no choice but to believe you.

Above all else, I’ve always trusted you and your decisions, whether you got married in a onesie or not. The amount of independence and responsibility you carry on your shoulders as a 20-year-old young woman baffles me. Although you both celebrated your one-month anniversary by getting married, I will always respect the amazing woman that you are and the monumental amount of pure and palpable love between you two.

Best Friend, we’ve been through hard times together, and we’ve both learned some pretty valuable lessons when it comes to relationships. You and I are both such giving people, and that can so often be used to our detriment. For too many years I watched you almost wither away completely at the hands of a toxic relationship. I saw your zest for life and your faith begin to fade, as he pulled you deeper and deeper into the depths of his own unhappiness and dissatisfaction. You were expected to not only fulfill your own heart and needs, but to fulfill his too, and you were exhausted. Being the strong and internally optimistic woman that I know you to be, you were able to pull yourself up by your bootstraps and kick his sorry butt to the curb. Shortly afterward, the universe rewarded you with good behavior and inserted this new and improved man into your life who uplifts your dreams and ambitions, provides honesty and security, and loves your soul for the same reasons I do. As a best friend, that’s all I could ever ask for.

Even from over 1,000 miles away I can see the light and happiness that this new man, your husband, reinforces in you. His incredible zest for life and faith give yours a run for your money; I could not be more ecstatic that you have a new best friend to add to the roster right next to me, and I have the utmost of confidence that he will successfully carry out the best friend duties that I am not able to. I love you and I love that he loves you too. However, I will not stop poking fun at the fact that I’ve known the awesome guy I’m dating longer than you’ve known your husband.

So all in all, you have taught me a couple things. Although I am still not getting married for a while, you have taught me that a truly healthy and happy relationship with two happy and healthy people does not need the test of time to validate its love; needless to say, time is essential when learning about who you love; however, time should not be the test of good loves durability, it should be the end result.