Without divulging too much, I have recently reached the point in my professional life where I am questioning everything about myself: my abilities, my strengths and my limit of discreet mental breakdowns at my desk.
There are many layers to this situation, and I don’t have the energy or the minimum requirement of time worked to gain unemployment, if I find myself in such a situation to warrant unemployment, to discuss details.
A mere four months into the start of a professional career, and I have successfully managed to think of every other major I should have pursued in college over a Psychology/Sociology degree. I have had many moments in which I swear at myself for actually taking my parents’ advice to choose whichever career my overly optimistic heart desires.
However, I do take a moment each day to calm all of the doubts in my mind that I will find my niche within this field. I remind myself that I work so hard every day, to the point that I stopped taking lunch breaks or stayed late without pay to finish all of the tasks I set out to finish that day. I became a bit neurotic, I admit, but that is why I bring this topic up. Many twenty-somethings, young adults, older adults and every age in between have probably had deep realizations that they may have completely messed up and don’t know how to move on from that mistake.
If you have felt that way, then you are totally going to be just fine the further you get into your career. This self-doubt and the endless irrational fears we experience as we navigate our lives are very human feelings and the self-inflicted terror you endure is completely normal. We may feel like everyone around us has figured out some super secret solution to professional success, but the reality is that those same people are just as terrified as you are.
When I’m feeling the crushing weight of my job holding me down, I remind myself that my job is not who I am.
Your job does not define you as a person, but it can be a great window of insight to see how some of the pieces of your unique puzzle fit together.
When I really think about my current professional position, I look beyond the vague variety of my job title and responsibilities and the measly paychecks I get direct-deposited into my even-more-measly bank account. Working in the field of mental health makes you rich in experience and empathy, but is definitely not done by those who want to be financially stable before they retire.
What my job reminds me is that I am a super awkward individual with a knack for building strong connections with the people I help. I would never have imagined myself as being that great with people, especially people I don’t know too well. But, somehow, I can use my comfort with long, awkward silences and ability to speak with clients like human beings, rather than helpless children. I don’t go into an appointment with a client with the attitude that they are damaged beyond repair. I just go into an appointment with clients with the goal to have a conversation and hopefully help them with at least one issue of the day.
I have an intense drive to treat people with respect no matter what their circumstances are or how different our lives may be. I am motivated to ensure that each person I work with is receiving the best guidance I could offer.
Being in the field that I am in, I have found that I love learning new things each day and I am beginning to really find my niche. I know that I am interested in the rights that my clients have, and that they are treated fairly. I know that there are so many interesting, alternative treatments that peak my interest.
I also know that any bad experiences I may have in my profession don’t mean that I should doubt my strengths or believe every doubt that others may have in me.
My job is not who I am, but a reflection of the best qualities in myself that I want to share with others to help them in some way. I am also learning what I want for my future and that I have many interests that I look to pursue along with my professional pursuits.
Where I am right now in my field of work is not where I will stay for the rest of my life. Every day that I get through without quitting is a day well spent, and strength well earned.