You throw a bunch of college students in a field and there are only 5 outfits that all of us can come up with. I understand that rodeo has a sort of underlying dress code (I too am guilty), but come on y'all....let's get a little more creative next year.
1. The Girl Who Is Only At Rodeo For The Insta
Bud Light shirt (but would never actually drink a beer), cowboy boots borrowed from a random girl in her sorority that she’s never met, red bandana tied as headband, “Theta Chi” written on her arm, pink polarized Ray Bans, neon fanny pack with duck tape over sorority name, American flag jean shorts she made from a Pinterest DIY. Complaining the whole time that it's too hot.
2. The Tequila Queen
Tequila Queen t-shirt cut into fringe J-Crew jean shorts that would normally be worn for a shopping day, vintage Tory Burch sunglasses, booties from DSW, Hermès belt, small gold hoops to show her class, bold red lip, beaded necklace so she can link her discount code. Asleep on the grass by 2:00 p.m.
3. The Girl Carrying The Four Loko
Warm, watermelon Four Loko in hand, Chevrolet shirt bought at Walmart the night before which was then strategically cut, jean shorts that are way too short, Asics tennis shoes so that she can run around, trendy circle sunglasses, choker made from the jorts of Old Row guy, blue bandana tied around arm right above “War Damn Rodeo” written in Sharpie. Leaves before concert even starts so she can get specials at Bourbon.
4. The Guy Who Submits His Pics To Old Row Every Weekend, But Never Makes It
Extra short jorts because he thinks we actually want to see his thighs, expensive Costa sunglasses he got from his grandma for Christmas, Justin boots fresh out of the box, mustache grown out to impress his fraternity brothers, unbuttoned flannel shirt with sleeves cut off, straw cowboy hat from circle K. Tries to shotgun a beer, spills it down his face, throws it at the ground and screams.
5. The Skinny, Rich Frat Guy
Yuengling beer t-shirt he stole from his dad's closet, khaki cargos, cowboy boots with Nike socks poking out the top, club master Ray Bans, Auburn fishing hat, Southern Tide croakie. Snapchats his entire experience.