Bid day is one of the most exciting days of your college life when you are one of the girls who has grown up looking at college pictures wishing you were there. You see all of your pretty, older friends from high school go to different universities. You see them join different sororities wearing their cute, colorful tank top dresses with their letters on them. You see them constantly posting cute pictures "throwing what they know" and somehow incorporating their letters into the caption on their Instagram pictures. A lot of girls know that they want to be in a sorority just from seeing the pictures.

On bid day you run into your new group of sisters. They are basically all standing there with signs, glitter, and tutus waiting for you. They literally welcome you in with open arms when they swarm you with hugs as soon as they run in your direction. Typically, after that, you go to take pictures and eat. This is when it hit me that sororities are not how people portray them to be on social media. I got to the place that we were eating at and I did not even know who to sit by. I saw a bunch of people taking pictures with each other as if they already knew each other and I did not have anyone. I tried to fit in, but it was awkward. I did not know anyone going through recruitment. I pretty much did not know anyone in the school. It was fun at first, running to them and feeling welcome, but it was one of the most awkward days of my life.

Typically, after bid day sororities will give you a girl to act as your "mentor." She will help you if you have any questions, take you to events, and give you presents. My mentor was absolutely amazing. The day after bid day I was blown up with texts from older members asking me to hang out. This felt pretty good, other than the fact that they were all doing different things. I ended up going out with the older girl I had been hanging out with all week, but I still wanted to get to know other girls. I had a blast the night I went out. I went home and could not wait for the rest of the year with these girls.

The farther I got away from bid day the fewer texts I got about hanging out. I realized that all of these girls who had been texting me had already made their friend group and I was not a part of it. I felt lonely. I sat in my apartment on the weekends, wanting to go out but not knowing who to go with. I felt so lonely, so I would just go home and be with my family and my boyfriend.

In December I started to write my resignation letter. I thought maybe sorority life isn’t for me after all. After going through all of high school thinking sororities were the coolest things I realized that maybe it wasn’t all that I thought it was. We had a lot of mandatory events to go to. My work was not handling that too well, either. I was stressed beyond belief and I was not enjoying sorority life at all. I kept seeing posts about girls planning on going to spring break together. I saw posts about girls planning on living together. I had a few friends, but if they were doing something else on the weekends I literally did not have anyone to hang out with.

I decided to wait it out on my resignation letter for just a couple more weeks. This is when a girl posted on our page asking if anyone was interested in going on spring break. I decided to comment and get more information on it. Needless to say, I ended up going.

I was incredibly anxious when I realized who was going. I was friends with one girl, but I hadn’t even talked to the rest of them at all for the most part. Immediately into our fourteen-hour drive, I started to regret the decision. I thought this was just going to be awkward and weird. I figured I could have saved myself so much money if I would have just stayed home with my boyfriend or worked instead.

We got to South Padre and I was incredibly tired. I could not go out that night. I went straight to sleep. A few other girls were too tired as well, but I was scared that the girls I was with would think that I am lame because I was not going out on spring break. I wished I would never have come. The next day, I went out with them to the beach. That night I actually did make it out and I had the time of my life. The day after that was the same way. On the third day, I could feel myself getting closer to all of the girls in the group. By the end of the week, we were best friends and we all knew a lot of still about each other.

This trip changed how I felt about the sorority in many ways. I realized that if I would never have gone on this trip that I would never have been able to make the amazing friends that I have now. I realized that it is completely normal for girls to feel left out and not welcome when they first get into a sorority. I was sitting back and pouting about not feeling welcome instead of doing something about it.

The thing about sororities, or girls in general, is that there are going to be cliques everywhere that you go. That is just how girls are. In every sorority, though, there are going to be girls who want to get to know every single person and make them feel welcome. I wasn’t feeling welcome, but there was no way for anyone else to know. I never told anyone so how were they supposed to know I wanted to drop? Also, when I could have been trying to make new friends, I was going home to hang out with my boyfriend. I was working. I was doing other things and not necessarily putting in the effort to the sorority.

Without my sorority, I do not know where I would be today. It really has changed me as a person. It has made me more mature and I have gotten an unbelievable amount of opportunities from it. If I would not have branched out to go on that spring break trip, I would have never met my best friends or my two amazing roommates. I probably would have gone back home to a community college. I really never would have known how much this organization would mean to me.

I am thankful that I put myself out there and went out of my comfort zone. This is for the girls who are feeling as if they are left out or not welcome. If you feel that way, say something. If you want to hang out with a certain girl, straight up say, “Hey, I thought you were super cool during recruitment. Want to hang out sometime this weekend?” I got my roommate by straight up asking her if she wanted to be roommates. Go outside of your comfort zone, because if you don’t you probably are going to be very unhappy for the rest of college. You have four years of your life left to be free and do what you want, do not spend it pouting. Spend it with the sisters who will be the best friends for the rest of your life.