Advice From An Uber Driver

Advice From An Uber Driver

Sometimes, advice can come from the strangest places.
71
views

“Honestly, can I tell you, ladies, something?”

You know that feeling when you’re in an Uber and the driver starts speaking and you, being cautious of everyone and everything, have no idea what the heck is about to happen. Well, that was me.

It was a typical college Friday night, my friends and I were in an Uber on our way to a party. If you’ve ever been in an Uber, you know they’re not stupid; they know you’re going to a party, and yes, they know that your friend in the backseat is on the verge of puking.

BUT...

My friends and I were sitting in the Uber talking about random things, when my one friend, Rachel, says something about liking a guy. Cue the Uber driver.

“Honestly, can I tell you, ladies, something? I’m speaking as the guy who knows college boys because I WAS a college boy not too long ago. If a boy isn’t giving you attention that you deserve, don’t worry about him because he isn’t worth it.”

We all looked at each other with shocked expressions on our faces. Our Uber driver??? Giving us boy advice??? What???

“And I don’t know if you guys know this or not but women are f***ing powerful. You have the power, ALL of the power. Men have no power over you. You have NO idea how much power you have.”

“College guys can suck, a lot. STD’s are a thing. Have fun but be very careful and don’t do anything that you don’t want to do. Always remember how much power you have!”

Then, we were at our destination. Typically, people can’t wait to get out of a car, but all 5 of us were so upset that our car ride was over.

He told us about his wife and his kids and how proud he is of them. You could feel all of the love in his heart with every word he said. All of us sat in the back seat in awe with this man and how genuinely good he was. His smile was so genuine.

He was right about everything, though.

I am not a feminist, at all. Nor am I one to preach about anything. I do believe in powerful women doing whatever the heck they want, however. Feminists have a bad reputation to some, but women that believe in women are a blessing.

Someone needs to believe in us because women are looked at as inferior and therefore mistreated. Women are powerful. Women are strong. Women are worth so much more than what you would believe.

So if my Uber driver ever reads this, thank you for your words and your beliefs. You are appreciated.

(Not direct quotes, just summarizations of conversation)

Cover Image Credit: Rachel Silverman

Popular Right Now

21 Funniest Pick-Up Lines I've Ever Heard

Are you my appendix? Because I don't understand how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.
349
views

With Valentine's Day behind us, I spent the day pondering (and researching) some of the greatest pickup lines I've ever heard. I wondered if I could compile a master list and, with a little help from some friends, I did it. Here's what we came up with the 21 funniest pickup lines I have ever heard:

1. "Do you have Acne? Because I want to get Proactive with you."

My best friend/roommate Courtney thought of this and I cried. All credit to her. (She's single, so hit her up.)

2. "Are you my appendix? Because I don't understand how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out."

Anatomical pick-up lines for the Grey's Anatomy fan in your life.

3. "How much does a polar bear weigh? [How much?] Enough to break the ice....Hi, I'm ___."

For when you just need to find a way to say hello.

4. (Hold out hand) "Would you hold this for me while I go for a walk?"

Simple. Direct. Useful for the cute dog-walker you always see walking at the park.

5. "Is your father Little Caesar? 'Cause you look Hot n' Ready."

Everyone loves pizza.

6. "If you were a transformer, you'd be a hot-bot, and your name would be Optimus Fine."

...Get it?

7. Check the label on their shirt. When they say, "What are you doing?" You say, "Just checking to see if you were made in heaven."

Even if it says "100% cotton," just roll with it.

8. "Can you hold on one second? I have to show you the prettiest girl I've ever seen." (Hold up front-facing camera on phone.)

Someone try this and tell me if it works.

9. "Girl, you're like Mastercard.....priceless."

Keeping it classy.

10. "My friends bet me that I wouldn't start a conversation with the most beautiful girl here. Want to go buy some dinner with their money?"

Makings of a first date 101.

11. "You look familiar. Did we have class together? I could've sworn we had chemistry."

This works even if you're not in a Chem class.

12. *In a museum*. "Hi, I'm ____. I would shake your hand, but that sign says not to touch the masterpieces."

Monet ain't got nothing on you, babe.

13. "Do you have 11 protons? Because you're sodium fine."

Likely to be most effective if the person is a science-lover.

14. "If you were a triangle, you'd be acute one."

Buh-dum tisssss.

15. "Is your name Wifi? Because I'm feeling a strong connection."

Provocative.

16. "There's 21 letters in the alphabet, right? Oh...never mind, I missed u r a qt."

Now I know my ABC's.

17. "On a scale of 1-10, you're a 9. And I'm the 1 you need."

Keep 'em coming.

18. "Are you Physics 212?" [No...] "Well you're something I just couldn't pass."

Particularly useful if you failed a few classes (we won't judge).

19. "Is your face from McDonald's? Because I'm lovin' it."

Ba-da-bah-bah-bahhhh.

20. "Do you mind if I walk you home? My mom always told me to follow my dreams."

Mama's boys unite.

21. "You remind me of chapstick....You're the balm."

I gagged a little reading this the first time.

If you happen to try any of these, report back on how they work. Happy Valentine's Day to all.

Cover Image Credit: url-dir.com

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

The Do's And Don'ts Of Tinder

The official guidelines to the dating app
535
views

Ladies and gentleman, I bring to you the official Tinder Do's and Don'ts. Listen up.

Don't just say "hey" or "what's up"

This is Tinder. Don't be boring. It is unlikely you are going to get a response.

Do message first with a cheesy pick up line

Just innocent and funny. Nothing creepy or sexual. And don't be afraid to message first.

Don't only have one picture

Not only blurry group photos. Not only shirtless pics. Have variety!

Do send gifs

Gifs are fun and casual and always lighten the mood!

Don't have a lame bio

Don't to be too serious. Don't be too weird. Don't leave it blank.

Do have pictures with puppies

Nobody swipes left on a puppy. Also, pictures with your little niece will increase your swipes.

Don't ask for phone number right away

She barely knows you. She is going to leave you on seen.

Do use quotes from The Office

She will fall in love.


Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

Related Content

Facebook Comments