It's been twelve years since my dad passed away. He was my best friend, my hero. Usually on this day I'm sad or drunk or both. This year I'm trying to just be thankful of what I do have, not what I don't.
I'm thankful for my stepdad, who loves me as his own. For his family, who took me in and made it clear that I was one of them from the very beginning. They've all done so much for me without realizing it. They gave me a family when I needed it most. When your siblings are all grown and married and having kids it's harder for them to be there anytime you need something. But they always made time for me, always been there any time I needed them. And that is something I will never be able to repay them for.
I'm thankful for my brothers, who do everything they can for me every chance they get. They are kind and crazy and protective and everything I need them to be. And I hope I am those things for them as well.
I'm thankful for my niece, the little sister I didn't know I needed. Emma Claire is exactly like me in so many ways it's terrifying. Her mood swings are to be expected of a teenager, and she can be a huge bitch when she wants to be, but she's also kind, caring and incredibly loving. She brings me so much joy and happiness, and I would do anything in the world to protect her. I just hope I never have to, I hope that no one ever hurts this perfectly imperfect human.
I'm thankful for my mom, and the extra time we got with her. When she got sick it was the most terrifying time for me. I didn't know how to handle it. Then she got better, and we did so much together. We got to make so many new memories, experience so many new things. I learned so much from her in that time. I will forever be grateful for the time we had, even on the days I hate that she's gone so much it hurts.
I'm thankful for my friends, my amazing friends. I have the best support system in them, it's hard to put into words just how much they mean to me. They are the most beautiful souls that could have blessed my life, and I am so glad they did. Whether it's getting lunch so I'm not alone when I'm sad or getting drunk, so I don't have to feel the pain for a night, they're always there. They listen to me complain, listen to me when I'm excited, and do anything they can to make me feel better when I'm down. They truly are the best friends a girl could ask for.
My heart hurts thinking of all the pain and suffering I've been through. But I'm thankful that I didn't have to go through it alone. I'm thankful for my incredible friends and family who go above and beyond to make sure I'm okay. I hate that my parents were taken from me so young, hate that we didn't get more time together, hate that there are so many things I should have asked them and didn't get the chance to. But I'm forever thankful for the amazing people in my life who make sure I keep fighting, especially when I don't want to. Here's to you, I love you, thank you.