Okay, you’ve just finished what was probably the hardest test in the history of tests. That test beat you up like a schoolyard bully. You’re not even sure what your name is anymore. The only thing you can remember from all the studying (cramming) you’ve been doing is your coffee order. You’re not even sure that this isn’t one of those movies where it turns out the character’s been dead the whole. You wouldn’t be surprised if you were dead the whole time. You’d be surprised if you weren’t dead right now. To bring you back to the world of the living, here are some ways to feel good after feeling so bad.
1. A long nap
Okay, no matter how you decide to treat yourself, you have to start with a long nap. You haven’t slept in like 4 days. And when I say long nap, I really mean long sleep. Just pass out for like 14 hours minimum. Your body deserves it. There is nothing purer in this world than sleep, so go ahead and
2. A whole pizza
You’ve just slept for approximately 11 years. Inevitably, you’re going to feel a little groggy. But you’ll realize one thing immediately upon waking up. You could eat a whole house. You know what you gotta do. It’s just a phone call away. Splurge a little and get it delivered. You deserve it, and no one has to know. Actually, it’s better if you don’t tell anyone. They’d probably just try to get you to share your magnificent pizza with all of your favorite toppings. But did they just stare death in the face like you did? No? Then, they can leave. If you don’t like pizza or something, I guess you could get Chinese food. But it wouldn’t fix the impurity of your soul caused by a lack of pizza consumption. Get a pizza.
3. A pint (or gallon?) of ice cream
Meet your two new best friends: Ben and Jerry. Pop over to your local grocery story and pick your favorite flavor. Heck, get some fancy gelato. This is your day. Once again, don’t tell anybody because they might try to take some of it or convince you that it’s not ‘sanitary’ to eat directly out of the container. Like, ugh, shut up, this is who I am. We all have that friend, but you deserve better than that right now.
4. A night out
This is the part where you can actually start being around people again. Your basic needs have been satisfied. Unfortunately, you slept for so long that it’s now 9 o’clock at night the next day. It’s a good thing you can roll with the punches. Get all your friends together (not Ben and Jerry, though, because they can really ruin a good party) and cut loose. Get jiggy with it or whatever you crazy kids do these days.
5. A night in with your favorite movie
If that’s not your thing, you can still get wild on your own couch. Invite all your friends over (including Ben and Jerry, this is their element) and pull out your favorite movie. You know the one I’m talking about. The one that you know all the words of. Your friends are gonna hate you for making them watch it with you, but they can deal. Honestly, just treat yo self.
6. A daytrip
Sometimes you just gotta get out of town. Being on campus just reminds you that class is still a thing that you have to do. That’s toxic. You don’t need that kind of negativity. Go to the next town over or your closest city and just spend the day there. Take in the new scenery and do something fun while you’re there. Pedicure, concert, whatever. As long as it makes you happy. Treat yo self.
7. A shopping trip
You can do this as part of your daytrip or at your local mall. Sometimes retail therapy is just the only way to get you back on your feet. Like “Parks and Recreation” said, “Clothes. Treat yo self. Fragrances. Treat yo self. Massages. Treat yo self. Mimosas. Treat yo self. Fine leather goods. Treat yo self!” And if that’s not convincing enough for you, listen to Nike. Just do it.
8. An online shopping trip
Maybe you don’t have a car, or maybe you’re just too exhausted mentally and physically to leave your bed. Either way, if you want the joys of shopping in the comfort of your home, take an online shopping day. Sure, you can’t try it on, so half of it isn’t going to fit, but it’s the thought that counts in the end. And the thought is all you need.