Move in day is coming up, which means thousands of people, specifically parents, will be crawling all over campus. Why do we as college students hate this so much? It's because even though we love them, they annoy us to no end. The second I see any kind of advertisement for family weekends, tours, or orientation, I cringe because I know the horror that it entails. Families, we love you, but going to campus and seeing tired, overworked college students in their natural habitat is never a good idea. Below is a compilation of the thoughts we have when we think of or see families on our campus.
1. Ugh, now I have to put real pants on.
There is nothing on this earth that college students hate more than wearing normal pants. The best part about being on campus is that everyone is on the same page and we accept our pajama-bearing peers. The families, however, will look at those people like they need serious help. Parents, please note that we do not have the time or energy to dress ourselves, nor do we care about looking like we weren't just hit by a bus.
2. Looks like I have to wear a smile for a few days
College is hard. Like, really hard. Do we like that? NO! Are we going to put on an act everyday like we like to constantly be overwhelmed by our professors with projects, homework, and exams? HELL. NO. Although I may try, please don't look at me like I'm awful if I walk around with the seemingly permanent scowl on my face brought on by semester after semester of academic beatings.
3. I should go to the bookstore for a thesaurus.
I think we all need one of these to see what words we can use instead of our usual not-so-family-friendly vocabulary that we spit out once we arrive on campus.
4. Why are you looking at me like a zoo animal?
I feel like this is the most important one. Especially when tours come around, parents just LOVE staring at us and making us feel like we have to do all of the things I listed above that we don't normally do. Please don't be disappointed when I don't do them. Also, why is it that families like to point at us and try to guess what we're doing or where we're going. You don't know my life! Maybe I am going to class, or maybe I'm going to have my daily mental breakdown at a wildcard location. Who knows?
5. Don't judge me for looking like Shrek.
For the last time, I'm not on my way to prom. I just came from a three hour lecture. Do. Not. Judge. Me.
6. You're looking at me like that? You should've seen your kid yesterday ...
You think I look gross? Chances are that's what your angel looks like every day too! Just embrace it and move on. It makes our lives easier. It's our college culture.
7. Leave me the hell alone.
We love you, families, but I am also probably having an internal conflict, so if you could kindly not engage in unnecessary small talk, that would be great.
8. I'm glad my family isn't that obnoxious.
Y'all can be crazy.
9. Maybe if I take a nap, they'll be gone when I wake up.
10. On the bright side, I get really good food!
I see you, college. You're bringing out the best food to impress mommy and daddy (throwback to prime rib on move in day). Hey, I'm not complaining. Keep it coming.