Middle school is one of the hardest times in a child’s life and my life was not any different. When I was 12 I believed that my life would stay the way it is for the rest of my life. I thought that nothing would change and that everything was set in stone. Luckily for me, things changed and these are somethings I want to tell my past self to make myself feel a little better.

Your wardrobe will change

All the silly-bands, converses and tied t-shirts will not be in your closet once you hit high school. You will learn that you will dress differently than other people and that is okay. Be who you are, not someone you saw on TV or someone popular in the hallway. If you constantly strive to be like someone else, you will lose yourself. Eventually, you will start to look like the teachers with the cardigans and high boots and you’ll love it.

You will not always be seen as a goodie-two-shoes

Do not do things to please others. When you do that, you become less happy about yourself. Growing up, you’ll learn that you need to put yourself first, even if it means that it’ll put someone down. This could relate to not going out because you needed to study for that biology test Friday, picking your top school even if it means you’ll be 3 hours away from your friends, or even telling someone the truth on how you feel when you know it may or may not hurt their feelings for a bit.

Your taste in music will develop

You will still be listening to Pop music like Rihanna but your love for music will grow. While this is happening, you will start to listen to other genres like Alternative Pop, R&B and yes, even country. To this day your friends will question your music and try everything in their power to make sure you do not get the aux cord. Show them wrong and blast whatever you want.

The people that are close to you now, won’t be there in the next 3 years

You will lose people. Whether it be someone passing away, they do not like you anymore or you do not like them. Being self-aware will result in you finding out what belongs in your world and sometimes you will figure out it and other times someone might see it before you do. Understand that while you are growing, your relationships with people will grow with you. There will be friendships that will run their course and at the moment, it’ll hurt but know that there are some amazing people waiting for you down the line.

You will start to feel alone, but know that you are not alone

When you reach the teen years, you become more independent. Prepare yourself for the mood swings, your personality changes, and possibly getting into a fight with mom. There will be nights when you will cry yourself to sleep. There will also be days when you do not want to talk to a single soul. You are not alone in this feeling. Do not let the dark thoughts(I know they are there) get to you. Your family is with you, same with your friends and even though you do not want to be a burden to them. Let them in.

You are beautiful, you are beautiful, believe it!

As the famous Christina Aguilera would say, “You are beautiful, no matter what they say.” This song will be the ultimate anthem of your young adult life. It will take you awhile to understand that beauty comes in all different shapes and sizes and that includes you. You’re 20 now and it is still a challenge for you accept your beauty, but you have definitely come a long way. You have become more confident and true to yourself and that brings out your beauty. Yes, you will have many friends you wish to look like but they have their own insecurities. Everyone is imperfect in some way so you need to believe that you are beautiful or the world will just look over you.

What you want to be when you grow up, is not the actual plan

I know right now, the job you want is not what you are going to school for. Our life takes a lot of twists and turns and then we get some concept of a realistic option for ourselves. Some days you will question yourself, other days you will want to throw things out a window when you cannot finish that 1800 word essay at 2 am because we both know that we need 8 hours of sleep to function.

Do not be afraid to embrace the lessons that come your way

This could be an experience, something you have written (even this article) or even person who has stepped in and out of this life. Everything has something that can teach you. You will want to cry over some of them, and that is okay to cry, but do not dwell too long on it or them. You are a strong girl and you need to understand that this is your story and that everything in a story all intertwines in order to make the story better, good or bad or even hilarious.

You have a long journey ahead of you. I am still learning as I go along as well. Some of these thoughts may stick to you longer than others but in full result, I hope this makes you a better person. Keep rocking the studded belt just a little while longer. The time for them to be out of style is fast approaching for you.