The Donald's campaign slogan "Make America Great Again" is undoubtedly burned into every American's brain this election season. Supporters showcase it on red hats; citizens display it with grace on green lawns; self-conscious conservatives exclaim it as their sole reason for voting for Mr. Donald Trump. But to what time period is Mr. Trump referring to when he claims he will make America great again? When exactly was America great? I would hesitate to confirm that Mr. Donald and I have the same definition of the word.

1. 2000 to 2009

The late 2000s were teeming with greatness and are inarguably a time we just must go back to again. Millions of people were forced onto the streets to begin worldly adventures when the housing bubble burst in 2007, and millions more were thankful for the opportunity to see how tough they were when they lost their jobs because of said bubble. Same-gendered couples around the country were blessed with the privilege to avoid marriage and the relationship-crushing memories that come with it, unlike today where gay marriage has been legalized (poor suckers).

2. Pre-1973

There was a glimmering time in American history, and we still get a peek of it today, when others tried to deem total control over a woman's body and what she does with it. This is a spectacular time that Mr. Trump and running mate Mike Pence have already begun trying to fling us back to! Open your eyes, America!

3. The 1940s to 60s

Ever since 1965, the American people have been longing to get back to a time of overt racism, racial segregation, and gender oppression. This

great time assured that black and white culture and people could live their lives separate but equal and that women could dust a mantle, bake a pie, and pop out eight kids all before hubby came home from work! If Donald Trump wants to Make America Great Again, this is definitely not a decade to ignore!

4. 1929 to 1939

Double the "great" of this time in American history. Perhaps Mr. Trump would like to take us back here?

5. The early 1900s

We all know the Donald isn't exactly a supporter of women, and no, sexual harassment doesn't count, so it shouldn't come as a surprise should he choose to Make America Great Again Like the early 1900s! This splendid time was successful because women just had to shut up and deal with it, due to their inability to vote until 1920, and we all know women just talk too damn much these days.

6. Any time before 1865

Now, this would be a time worth repeating! America was truly Great when its economy was solely based on genuine, hard-working people that came to America with a dream. A dream that would be fulfilled by their dedication to their work from womb to tomb, with no distractions (or freedom, whatever you want to call it) getting in the way. If only Americans today had such a great work ethic!

I refuse to "vote a lesser of two evils," because our president should not be elected based on "I hate this person less," and advise all of you out there who are looking for a third candidate to research Gary Johnson! We have another choice and America could be great, for once! #youin?