6 Things I Will Never Apologize For

6 Things I Will Never Apologize For

This may piss some people off.
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I have anxiety. If you know me, you may be aware that every time I do something I think is wrong, I am quick to say "I'm sorry." Recently, however, that perspective has changed. I do not want to purposefully apologize for things I know are not wrong. So, with that being the flame to start my fire, I decided to use Odyssey to express the things that I refuse to apologize for.

1) Using my "woman card."


Look, it's 2016. If you still are in the stone ages and believe that women should not have basic needs like equal pay, then what world are you living in. I know that many people feel that 78 cents for every dollar is not a big difference, but at the end of the day, it adds up. The fact that we even have to have this discussion in 2016 is quite honestly a slap in the face to women who have fought for years trying to get this settled.

2) Being a liberal.


My family uses the term "liberal" as if it is derogatory. LOL. I am proud that I was able to discover my own personal beliefs and not adhere to the traditional Southern Republican stigma. I know that it makes me a bit of an outcast to them, but the fact that I believe in basic rights for all human beings keeps my passion for certain issues alive.

3) Opening up to people.


I have some serious trust issues from when I was a child, and it shows as an adult. When I do choose to open up to people, it takes a lot of internal courage. Not only that, I have to resist the urge to cry, as I do not wish to show that kind of emotion. When you do see that side of me, it is something large. If not to you, at least to me.

4) Crying.


I know I just mentioned how much I hate crying, but it sometimes just feels good to let all kinds of pent up emotion out. My triggers can be strange at times, but when I do cry, it's something I don't apologize for. Every now and then, it's a necessary time for me to say, "okay, I have had enough."

5) Not wanting kids


Women have the idea that they must have children instilled in them at a very young age. Personally, when I look at the future, kids are not in it. I know that kids are not apart of the equation, at least for now.

6) Being myself.


One of the things that I take a lot of pride in is the fact that even though I have had a lot of adversity in my life, I still have remained true to myself. Now more than ever, I am taking that passion for being me and pushing it to new heights. I only hope that I can encourage other amazing women to do the same. At the end of the day, I am happy with who I see in the mirror. Are you?




Cover Image Credit: BuzzFeed

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19 Reasons Why The 'Part Tomboy Part Girly-Girl' Is The Best Type Of Girl

With us, you get the best of both worlds, the best of BOTH girls.
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1. She has a guy’s sense of humor so you will constantly be laughing together.

2. She knows how to handle your sarcasm, and she’ll throw it right back in your face.

3. Your friends will love her because she is basically one of the guys (except for the facts that she smells good and shaves her legs).

4. She can kick your ass in dizzy bat, pool or maybe, on a good day, beat you in shot-gunning.

5. Little things don’t bother her- she is rational and level-headed.

She knows how to put things into perspective and knows what is worth getting mad over and what just isn’t.

6. BUT she also has a sensitive side... she knows the ways to your heart whether it is an amazing home cooked meal or a good back scratch.

She is always thinking of ways to make your day because she is thoughtful.

7. She will call you out on your BS, because let's be honest... someone has to.

8. She’ll eat pizza and drink beer with you, and maybe if you are lucky she’ll even smoke a cigar.

9. She cleans up nice.

Sometimes her hair is in a messy ponytail and a hat, but other times she looks like she just stepped off the red carpet.

10. She doesn’t mind getting dirty.

She can spend a day on the boat, fishing and wakeboarding, hunting, shooting guns, or eating unlimited chicken wings with you.

11. She is go-with-the-flow and always up for anything and everything.

Festival? Amusement park? Concert? Drive-in movie? A day at the beach? Hell yeah, sounds awesome.

12. She likes to work out, but she isn’t a health freak… sometimes you just gotta have a McChicken.

No regrets, you know what I’m sayin'?

13. She has an open mind about people, places, and trying new things.

You will never be bored with her.

14. She can get along with pretty much anybody.

15. She doesn’t care what people think.

She’ll be the first one on the dance floor at the wedding, but the same person who helps an older man carry his bags to the car at the mall.

16. Your sisters will adore her, but so will your brothers.

17. She isn’t afraid to voice her opinion and stand up for what she believes in.

18. Not only does she not mind doing “guy things,” but get this... she actually enjoys them and will do them with you.

She’ll watch late night ESPN with you, play basketball in the pool, be player 2 in "Tony Hawk Underground," go fishing, dirt biking, you name it, she is down.

19. Safe to say, we’re pretty word.

So word, in fact, we might even be going extinct... So, if we just so happen to grace you with our majestical presence, you better make damn sure you don't let us go.

Cover Image Credit: Catherine Anne Guarino

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Never Ask Your 'Black' Friend These 8 Questions

Don't do it, Karen, just don't. I know you weren't raised to be culturally sensitive but please just don't.

msmry
msmry
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Going to a PWI and finding yourself as the only black person in your friend group sometimes can offer you the title of "Honorary Know-It-All" regarding your race and culture. Now before you start yelling at your technological device, don't.

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I am not saying it is not OK to ask questions especially if you want to be more informed about who to interact with those of minority races. It is good to try and be more informed about a different culture but sometimes the way people try to achieve this can be insensitive.

"OMG Your hair looks so soft! May I touch it?"

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No! Just No! I don't care if it would make your year you can not touch my hair. And for Pete's sake do not do that thing were you ask but YOU ARE ALREADY TOUCHING MY HAIR. Seriously, what was the point of asking? Foreal those don't ask and don't touch unless maybe it's like your best friend. Most people of color work very hard to get there hair perfect and also we don't know where your hands have been. No touchy!

"Is that all your hair?"

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Just don't. Like, seriously just don't. And also don't assume you know the answer because there are a lot of black women now that have a lot of hair. Not to mention because our society pressures us to fit this ideal image that usually results in the damaging of our hair we often use fake hair to protect our own from the everlasting effects of colonization — sorry, I meant "relaxers." (Not really.)

"Where are you 'really' from?"

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OK, this goes for all minorities. Do not do the whole "well where are you "really" from?" because you not "really" from here either Karen. Especially for black people this is a question that is directly related back to colonization because half of us have no clue were our ancestors came from and the chances of us ever knowing is basically none because of the everlasting effect of you know whipping out an entire civilization for reasons I still say is bullshit.

Why is it OK for black people to say the "N" word?

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OK, let's get one thing straight even we can not come to condenses on this topic. However, it is NOT OK for anyone who is not black to say the "n" word. Why is this you ask? Let me give you a history lesson.

The "N" word is a racial slur often directed towards those of African descent. This term is deeply rooted in a very racially charged era of American history and sadly is still used today to have the same offensive derogatory effects typically when coming from those, not of African descent. Now there have been some efforts to rebrand and claim words that were used to degrade areas in society and the word "nigga" is one of those. Again, even we can't get on the same page with this but I would say us using the term is a way of reclaiming the past that was intended to break us down.

"Do you have a mom AND a dad?"

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"You sure that's your name?"

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Yes, I am sure! This is the bane of my existence. My name is MARY ELIZABETH MINNS. And yes, it is spelled just like the queen of England. No, it is not Marri, not Marre, not Merri, not Merre or any other convoluted way you can find to spell my name. No, not all black people have some unique name with some unique spelling.

"You DON'T like chicken and watermelon?"

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Yes, I am black and I am proud. But no I do not necessarily live on fried chicken and watermelon so if you invite me over don't ask if that's what I want. I would rather have pasta. Do not make assumptions off of any type of stereotype but especially this one.

"Can you swim?"/ "Really, you can swim?"

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Yes, I can swim and so can other black people. No, not all of us are good at track and basketball and yes, some of us can swim and enjoy it too. I mean for Pete's sake, our ancestors were brought over in boats and there is still a bunch of us in the Bahamas.

This is, of course, supposed to be a light-hearted way of addressing a serious issue. But, next time you are talking to your minority friends, just be aware and culturally sensitive. Think before you speak. I mean really think before you speak.

msmry
msmry

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