As flowers start to bloom and signal the beginning of spring, it's inevitable that “new love” and relationships start to bud as well. But instead of giving you tips on what your relationship should be, I felt it was important to emphasize what your relationship should not be. Here are a few of my suggestions:
1. Goals
Your relationship, nor anyone else's, should be seen as “relationship goals.” Each relationship is unique, so there is no standard to meet. Labeling a relationship as “goals” puts unnecessary pressure and unrealistic expectations on the couple. So don't aim for this yourselves, or encourage others to aim for it.
2. Completion
So often I hear people say “He was the piece of me I didn't know I needed” or “She's my better half.” Personally, I think this is stupid. You were a complete person before this relationship. You will remain a whole person even if this relationship didn't exist. Just please stop doing this.
3. Salvation
Sometimes people can say their relationship makes them a better person. While you and your partner should encourage each other to be better, your partner is not the thing that makes you a better person. You alone are in charge of that. But when you think otherwise, it can lead you toward being my next point…
4. Overly Dependent
When you cannot see yourself as a separate entity from your partner, you become overly dependent on them. Over dependence is so unhealthy. There is definitely a level of dependence you should have in your partner. You should trust them to have your back and to support you, but you shouldn't be so dependent that you can't function without them.