My 5 Favorite Songs From Lemonade

My 5 Favorite Songs From Lemonade

Queen B is at it again. Lemonade is probably one of her best albums yet.
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Beyoncé’s new album, "Lemonade," made its debut on Saturday night on HBO and Tidal. She is one of the most influential people, and to those who don’t like her, I don’t want to meet you. She is a hard-worker, and I support her always. When watching her visual album, I noticed it wasn’t the typical Beyoncé that we’ve been used to. She wrote all of the songs, and you can tell. I’ve never been more impressed with anyone. She spoke about not only her relationship with Jay Z, but also about black equity, which can be heard through her song, “Freedom.” Here are my top favorite songs from Beyoncé’s “Lemonade.”

1. “Hold Up”

The intro comes in, and you’re a little confused because it sounds like an abandoned amusement park. Then the beat drops. Right off the bat (literally, she has a bat), she talks about how they don’t love him like she loves him. She puts him first, and he still can’t manage to treat her. Beyoncé really shows her vulnerability because she explains how he’s coming up after midnight, smelling how he shouldn’t be smelling and what she found on his call list. Then she asks, “What’s worse - jealous or crazy?” She continues to talk about how she loves him, and then she says, “You let this good love go to waste.” It’s a good introduction to the situation of what is about to continue on into the album. Even though she’s smashing his windows, you hear the music, and it’s nice and mellow with a good beat. If you sing the song smiling like she did, it’s harmless.

2. “Don’t Hurt Yourself”

Whoever is messing with her, she wants them to know she isn’t average. Beyoncé isn’t playing with this one. She is fed up and is about to be out because she doesn’t need you. She didn’t need you to begin with because she has her own money, honey. Whatever you do to Beyoncé, you do it to yourself. She knows you’re lying, and you aren’t trying hard enough. Step up your game; she’s already too much for you. Beyoncé had the nerve to not only call him out about the fragrance she smells, but she went that extra mile and said give her a big kiss for me. Beyoncé sings, “You thought you were slick, huh?” As the song ends, she says it’s his final warning. It makes you wonder what she’s going do if he doesn’t take his final warning seriously. “You gon’ lose yo wife,” she says.

3. Sorry

This title is super confusing because she starts right off with saying, “I ain’t sorry.” She isn’t picking up his calls, isn’t thinking about him and is out with her friends. She’s over it. You go, Beyoncé! She has her middle finger up with hands high, waving it in his face and telling him, “Boy, bye.” This song makes me want to call my exes and say, “I ain’t sorry,” and I dated them years ago. She talks about how she regrets getting married because he’s late and is going to come home with some dumb excuse. Beyoncé is ready to roll out and move on with her life without looking back. This is her 2016 “Irreplaceable.” My favorite part is when she drops, “You better call Becky with the good hair.” Yes, middle finger up, deuces up, goodbye and call Becky with the good hair.

4. “6 Inch”

Beyoncé just has all the confidence in the world because she’s walking into the club and doesn’t care whatsoever. I really like this song. This is the song I will play forever when I get ready before I’m about to go out. This song just speaks about her getting her money nonstop and how she’s earned everything she owns. This is more of just a guilty pleasure because she’s doing what she has to do for her, no one else. Yes, Beyoncé, keep hustling.

5. “Daddy Lessons”

It starts off with that Louisiana vibe, and you’re feeling like you’re right on Bourbon Street, killing it during Mardi Gras. Then the guitar music comes in, and you’re ready to jam. She explains that she’s “daddy’s little girl,” and she had to grow up tough. This song is basically about her father teaching her how she should value herself and be strong, not letting any man push her around or make her feel any less than what she’s worth. Basically, shoot any man who isn’t worth it and who makes you cry. It’s a little extreme. Also, her dad says, “He’s playing you.” It just goes to show how much a dad really knows when it comes to his little girls. Here’s to the dads who have their daughters’ backs.

Cover Image Credit: idolator.com

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The Realness And The Rubbish

What reality TV offers its audience
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I watch a lot of reality TV.

Most people’s immediate mental image when reality TV is brought up is mind-numbing Kardashian Jersey Bachelor Teenage Pregnancy cultural slime that is dumbing America down one “unscripted” episode at a time. I share this same disdain towards a lot of the shows that dominate Bravo, MTV, and ABC (especially the white hetero-pile of toxic sludge that is “The Bachelor”) but with a lot of these shows I find myself unapologetically, sometimes regretfully sucked in.

Our modern concept of “reality television” didn’t really exist in America until 1992 when people stopped being polite and started getting real on “The Real World” where seven strangers were picked to live in a loft in New York City: today, 25 years later, it is inescapable. In my twenty years of experience consuming media I have learned that reality TV is one of the easiest ways to connect with people. In the fifth grade I remember discussing “American Idol” with my science teacher and my classmates like it was a religion. In junior high “The Glee Project” capitalized off of adolescents’ obsession with Finn Hudson and high school glee clubs. Today, on “Bachelor” nights groups of girls congregate in dorm common spaces with TVs across my university’s campus. In my own world “RuPaul’s Drag Race” is practically the fabric of mine and other fanatics’ lives. The day after a queen is eliminated I am either in mourning or praying for my favorite’s numbered days in the competition. I remember when I was young there was a cartoon called “Total Drama Island” that was a faux-reality parody of shows like “Survivor” that my friends and I were absolutely obsessed with. I’m still traumatized by the memory of my parents telling me I couldn’t watch anymore because it was too mature for my age.

These reality shows (one merely a parody of reality) have quietly (or not so quietly) influenced me and Americans for years and I’m trying to work through the thoughts surrounding this controversial subject. Many agree that reality TV is frivolous, fluff, lacking any real substance. It’s where the thin, the white, and the heterosexual go to drink, debauch, and embarrass themselves with each ridiculous fight. Most of the TV shows we know have been proven to be fake, unreal, tearing down the edifice that reality TV has built up.

But I love it.

I can’t get enough of it.

Most of the TV I watch and actually keep up with is reality, past and current. The more I watch of it, I realize that a lot of it is filth. So unimportant, so uninspiring, so unartistic, but I can’t stop watching. I’ve realized, though, that it’s because reality TV isn’t a sprint, but a marathon. There’s so much of it that you have to sift through to find the gems worth your attention. In a normal TV show there’s only so much room for boring air time, footage without purpose; everything is deliberate, while reality isn’t supposed to be. Real life isn’t exciting 24/7: it can get messy, it can often seem pointless. But you need to sit through most of it to get to the good stuff, just like with reality TV.

How many episodes of “The Hills” did I have to sit through to get to that single, mascaraed tear that falls down Lauren Conrad’s cheek (“You know why I’m mad at you, you know what you did!”)? Countless seasons of “The Real World” were watched to see that guy slap Irene in Seattle after she outted him. Kim K losing her diamond earring in the ocean and crying has reached peak memedom (“Kim, there’s people that are dying.”) The night Taylor Hicks snatched the crown off of American sweetheart Katharine McPhee’s precious head on “American Idol” would go down in history as The Day the Music Died. And then there’s that guy from “Survivor” who lied about his freaking grandmother dying just to not get voted off the island.

So, I’d like to validate the hours I spend watching twenty somethings get into yet another drunken fight or the parents with way too many children or a Hilton sister milk a cow with the thought that I am waiting. Waiting for that culturally defining moment that I’ll have seen first hand and not after being recycled into a tweet or a meme.

I also hold out hope that these shows are actually real, or at least hold onto some thin shred of reality. I’d like to think that in the finale of “The Hills” when the camera pans away from Brody Jenner to reveal a soundstage, implying that none of the past six seasons were actually real, that this was just an artistic choice, not telling of the actual scriptedness of the show. We’ll never know for sure whether “Laguna Beach” was the real Orange County or just the fake one, so for now all I can do is hope.

Cover Image Credit: unspalsh

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6 Comments You're Sick Of Hearing If You Wear Glasses

Yes I can count the number of fingers you're holding up
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I've been wearing glasses for as long as I can remember. In fact, I still have my first pair of little purple glasses sitting in the top drawer of my dresser back home. Being as visually impaired as I am, you can bet I've heard all of the jokes and have been asked all of the questions. These are a few of the comments that people who wear glasses and contacts are sick of hearing.

1. "How many fingers am I holding up?"

Without my glasses, your fingers might be a bit blurry, but that doesn't mean I've lost the ability to count. I can still make out the outlines of the two fingers you're holding.

2. "How bad are your eyes?"

Bad enough that I have to have corrective lenses! My prescription doesn't even make sense to me, how is it going to make sense to you?

3. "Are those glasses real?"

Yeah they're real! I don't go to Claire's and buy frames for fashion or steal the 3D glasses from the movies and pop the lens out of them. I need these for sight, Karen!

4. "Do your contacts hurt to put in/take out/wear?"

They don't hurt once they're in my eye and if they do, that means they're scratched or old and I should probably throw them away. For the most part, they're great until a speck of dust or eyelash gets in my eye. Then, and only then, do my eyes feel like they're legitimately on fire.

5. "Why do your glasses fog up so much?"

This is why I never wear glasses in the winter. The lenses fog when you go from a really cold place into a heated building and water condenses. The result is me looking like Chandler up there: confused and blind.

6. "Are you near or far sighted?"

I honestly couldn't tell you. All I know is my eyes are messed up beyond repair and I need glasses for the rest of my life.

Cover Image Credit: goodfreephotos.com

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