Oswego: a small college town right off of Lake Ontario that dazzles both incoming and current students each and every day. The town itself is a bit run down, but hidden within are many great places open for students to discover and enjoy. Although the college is made to appeal as a top of the notch school, there are several aspects of the school itself that raise more than a few questions. SUNY Oswego -- we pay your tuition, so now it is time for you to answer some of our questions.
1. What even is a Laker?
2. Is the quad ever going to be used for anything or is it just going to sit there all sad and neglected?
3. Why do you hire advisors that do not know the answers to questions they are put there to answer?
4. Why is it so difficult for advisers to attend their scheduled appointments? Aren't they paid to do that?
5. Why don't the tour guides ever go through West Campus?
6. Are you ever going to remodel West Campus?
7. Forget West Campus -- are you ever going to remodel the library?
8. Why won't you put at least one printer in every residence hall?
9. Were there really ropes lining the sidewalks to keep people from blowing away many years ago?
10. Can you reinstall said ropes, please?
11. Do dining halls actually put laxatives in the food or is something just wrong with the entire student population's digestive system?
12. Why isn't there a parking lot for every residence hall?
13. Where are all of Lakeside's residents supposed to park?
14. Why does your snow plowing system involve burying all of the cars it passes in a horribly deep amount of snow?
15. You know we have to shovel all of that ourselves, right?
16. Why do you hide "optional fees" on our student bill?
17. Why don't you inform us on how to remove these fees?
18. Is the bell tower in Sheldon actually haunted?
19. Why are there 20 washers and 15 dryers for 300 residents in each residence hall?
20. Do you understand how much of a pain it is to wait four hours just to dry your clothes?
21. Why is the shower water only sometimes hot?
22. How many times a semester do the elevators on West Campus break down or get stuck?
23. Why can't we take containers of food out of the dining hall?
24. Don't we pay for it?
25. Why is my dorm room either scorching hot or a freezer, and not in between?
26. Why do we have to pay for a gym membership when other SUNY schools offer one for free?
27. If a student gets hit by a car/bus on campus, will you actually pay for their tuition?
28. If someone's roommate dies do you actually give the living roommate a 4.0 for the semester?
29. When you hire professors, why do you hire them?
30. Because they would be a great educator?
31. Or because they are going to do research that will make our school look better?
32. Why can't we have pets on campus?
33. Why doesn't the Starbucks on campus take Starbucks gift cards?
34. Why does every student that works in a dining hall hate working there?
35. Are they treated poorly?
36. Is the tutoring center actually a good resource?
37. Are the tutors trained to teach the material the certain way the professor of the class would?
38. Does it hurt your feelings that the sole reason most people picked this school was Lake Ontario?
39. Or are you just happy you are getting your money?
40. But seriously, can you tell us what a Laker is now?