What's Your Love Language?
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What's Your Love Language?

There are five love languages, chances are yours is how you love others. Observe those around you to find out what theirs is.

What's Your Love Language?
Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash

The love languages are categories of behaviors that someone most immediately associates with affection. And yes, you can have more than one. We all identify with all of them on some level, but normally there are one or two strong connections that we have that radiate love for us. Most times we just think of sharing our love languages between ourselves and our significant other, but it affects all of our close relationships. If you're not doing things that speak to someone's language they often feel misinterpreted and like there's a lacking connection. When really you're just not speaking the other person's language.

Words of affirmation 

Verbal expressions of care and affection. Like "You look really nice today." Consequently, these people get very hurt by insults and discouraging words.

Acts of service 

Doing something helpful and kind for someone. Like doing the dishes so they don't have to. For someone who favors this affection, a lack of support can be very damaging to your relationship.

Quality time 

Spending time together doing an activity that both people enjoy. If this is your love language having distance or feeling distanced by a person can be very hard for you.

Physical touch 

A physical expression of love, can be sexual or more platonic. Such as a pat on the back, holding hands, or sex. The absence of this can leave a person feeling isolated in the relationship.

Giving and receiving gifts 

Tangible and intangible items make you feel important and noticed. Like a little note or picking up the wine you like. To people that favor this when it is absent from their every day they feel particularly hurt.

The original publicator of the love language theory, Gary Chapman, tells us to simply express love in the way that feels most natural to us. Then explain to others what your love language is, how you like to be shown love and what makes you feel the most appreciated. It can be difficult to interpret someone's language, but a good first guess would be identifying how they show you love, normally people give affection how they want to receive it. Chances are you have a different language than most of those around you, and communicating with those you love to find out what it is is a key to a healthy relationship.

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