1. I can honestly count on one hand the number of times I've been to a crappy college bar in the past six months.

2. It'll be fun! I'm still in college, I should go while it's still acceptable.

3. What do the kids wear out these days?

4. Can I just wear leggings?

5. "What are you going to wear?"

6. "Cool, I'll wear the same thing."

7. Jeans are very different than leggings.

8. Is there really a line out the door?

9. I don't carry cash on me ... Do you take cards for cover?

10. Why is it $3 more if I pay with a card?

11. That doesn't even make sense.

12. Wow, I've never seen so many 18-year-olds.

13. Why is the music so loud?

14. Drinks are free? I'll take 10.

15. Oh... Now I know why they're free. It's basically just rubbing alcohol and soda in a cup.

16. Do they serve food???

17. Of course they don't.

18. I would honestly kill for some mozzarella sticks right now.

19. Ugh, with really chunky marinara.

20. And the extra stringy cheese.

21. Why are they playing "Yeah" by Usher?

22. It's 2015.

23. This song came out when I was in the fifth grade.

24. That means that these kids were in the first grade.

25. I'm gonna die soon.

26. Why are they grinding so hard?

27. I did not know that people still grind. (grinded? ground?)

28. I really love fighting my way to the bathroom.

29. Wow, there is someone puking.

30. It's 9 p.m.

31. On a Thursday.

32. No toilet paper ... SCORE.

33. I really love working on my squats in a bar bathroom.

34. I think it's time to go.

35. I lasted fifteen minutes.