3 Things I will Always Tell My Daughter
Now that I am older I cannot help but acknowledge all of the hard work my parents put into making me the woman I am today. Both of my parents have always been very active in my life, sometimes more than I would like but that’s what they are for. Hopefully, one day (not anytime soon) I will have the pleasure of having a daughter of my own and be half the parent that my parents are for me.
A few things that I will always tell my future daughter
1) “If he teases you he likes you”: If a boy if teasing her I will not ever tell her that it is because he likes her. The idea that if someone likes you they will tease you promotes that verbal abuse, bullying, and even domestic abuse is "okay". One day your little girl is going to have a boyfriend and it is SO CONFUSING when a boy has mixed emotions, we are taught as such a young age that if a boy is mean to you he likes you, but when we grow up we are told to leave a boy when he is mean to us. Whether it is not talking to her for days or getting a little too physical during an argument, she should never feel like any of that is okay. What age does the “if he teases you he likes you” theory end? Where is the line? Is it drawn once we get into junior high? High school? College? I want more for my daughter, I want her to know when to let go of her first love, and I want her to know what true love is.
2) Confidence is beautiful: I will always focus on my daughter’s body positivity and strength. I will always remind her how amazing her body is and make sure she knows that what her body is capable of is so much more important than how it looks. I will never make comments about how much she eats after her basketball practice or make her feel like any less of a person her gaining 3 pounds. If I notice she is starting to question herself I will remind her how much I love her, and how proud I am of her. As my parents always tell me, “I love you to the moon and back again.”
3) “Do as I say not as I do”: “Do as I say, not as I do” as much as we hear this saying it could not be further from the truth. If we tell our children not to do something but we continue to do that it is called hypocrisy. The definition of hypocrisy does not change once a person becomes a parent. I will always tell my daughter, "Do as I do", although I have always struggled to have confidence in myself and I do not see that changing anytime soon. But I will make my best effort to not discuss my diet in front of my future daughter or saying I "need to" work out or have to avoid a certain food. I will not ever give my daughter the idea that she is anything less than perfect. I will do my best to be the best me I can be so that my daughter will strive to be the best woman she can be. Showing my future daughter a healthy lifestyle is very important for me, whether it be going on hikes together or making strawberry banana smoothies from fresh fruit. It is crucial that I raise a daughter he loves her body and takes care of her body all the same.
My parents are amazing people and I love them dearly. They never fail to tell me how proud they are of me and of my accomplishments. One day I will have a daughter too and my only hope is that she will not only be a successful woman but also love herself as much as she loves others.