As a server and bartender, I figured it was time to make this. I've been in the service industry for five years now, and it really isn't for everyone. There's good days, and there's bad days. The fun part about this job is you get to interact with different types of people. You get your regulars who you can always count on to be nice and tip fairly well. You get the really nice people who don't ever tip over 10 percent, but they weren't difficult so it balances out. You get the really needy people and you just want to snap, but you bite your tongue. You get the ones who try to complain and get free meals, but it doesn't work so they'll probably stiff you. No day is the same when it comes to the types of people you'll come across and that's the fun in it all. You never know how the day is going to go. It could be a really good night, or a rocky one. You've just got to go in with a smile on your face and pretend one of the pettiness from the customers bother you. After my experience lately, I’ve come up with some things that your server and or bartender are most likely think on a daily basis.
1. "Can’t you see me running around like a chicken with my head cut off?! Please wait."
2. "Don’t you dare snap your fingers at me."
3. "Yes hi, I see you. Yes I see you waving at me. Can’t you see I’m helping someone else?"
4. "Oh crap, did he say ranch or bleu cheese? Oh well, too late now."
5. "Doesn’t the hostess realize she just triple sat me? Three four tops in a row...cool."
6. "Oh you’re complaining after you finished your whole meal after I asked how everything tasted? Nah you’re not getting a free meal today, sir."
7. "Wow I’ve had to pee for over an hour now. Guess I’ll continue to hold it."
8. "What do you mean 86 pot roast?! It’s only 6:00 p.m.!"
9. "Hot plate, hot plate, hot plate. Okay you’re almost there...sweet new burn to add to the collection."
10. "Corner!"
11. "Ugh, not you again."
12. "Oh, yep that was mashed potatoes I just touched."
13. "Oh you wanted vodka with 7-up? Then don’t say ‘vodka soda please’ next time."
14. "Is it time to go yet?"
15. "Wow am I the only one sweating right now?"
16. "Yes…that is what you ordered...it’s what I wrote down…"
17. "Finally, I can pee!"
18. "Of course you stiffed me...all because you wanted a free meal."
19. "Did she really come in already intoxicated thinking I'd serve her?"
20. "When will people realize there are rules?"
21. "You're not worth losing my liquor license, sorry not sorry."
22. "Please don't seat me, please don't se-- thank God!"
23. "Where the hell is the bus boy?"
24. "Oh wow this looks good, maybe I'll get that for dinner."
25. "Of course I know how to make an AMF, do I look like a rookie or...?"