I just want to apologize to all of the Pumpkin Spice Latte fans, just know that I don't hate you, but I hate your taste in coffee. I mean don't get me wrong, I love my Starbucks just as much as any other person, but Starbs, you messed up with the PSL, hun.

1. A Rusty Nail

Okay, only slightly dramatic, but also maybe not. It's like a fun little game where you get to find out what new diseases you can gain.

2. A Random Toothbrush You Found On The Sidewalk

What? It'll just strengthen your immune system.

3. My Dog's Breath

While I do love puppy kisses more than anything else, there is something not so fresh about a mouth that licks its own butt.

4. A Pre-Chewed Piece Of Gum

Yum, I mean, if it's good enough for Buddy The Elf, then it's good enough for me!

5. A Lightbulb

I honestly can only picture the scene in the Grinch where he is just munching on some fresh glass. But ya know, lightbulb > PSL

Bonus points if its still attached to the ceiling.

6. Food From The Chum Bucket

Yeah, and I'm not talking about with the secret formula, I'm talking good old-fashioned fresh chum, Plankton's favorite.

7. All The Lint You Forgot To Remove From The Dryer

And man that sucker gets big after like one day, so imagine going like two weeks without taking it out.

8. A 9 Year Old McDonald's Cheeseburger

We should probably be more concerned with the fact that it doesn't have mold all over it and that it isn't gray. But you know, that's processed food for ya!

9. Warm Milk That's Been Sitting In Your Car For A Week

I'm not even sure what would be the best part, the smell or the big chunks hidden at the bottom.

10. An Old Car Battery

Who knows what germs are on it...or what acids are in it!

11. The Combined Sweat From The Entire Football Team

I mean I like Go Tops and all, but I can't imagine that they smell very well after practice/games.

12. A Half-Eaten Sandwich Sitting On A Park Bench

Is it ham? Is it turkey? Is it human meat? That's just part of the surprise!

13. All Of The Trash Currently Sitting In Your Car

Well, I'd say mine would just be a lot of half empty water bottles, so that isn't the worst thing.

14. Donald Trump's Spray Tan

Nuff said.

15. Your Roommate's Tears During Finals Week

This might be a problem because mine doesn't cry, or so she says, but just wait until she sees a bug in the room.

16. Figgy Pudding

What even is that? Doesn't matter, still worth it.

17. My Dad's Cooking

Sorry, Dad...but refried beans and a microwavable pizza doesn't count as a well-rounded meal.

18. 3 Shots Of Taco Bell's Diablo Sauce

Talk about straight fire. And no you can't chase it with water, you just get to soak in all that heat and be thankful that it wasn't the spice from the PSL.

19. A Middle School Boy's Bottle Of Axe Body Spray

I mean I don't even like to smell that stuff, but it's better than the alternatives, smelly middle school boys and having to drink a PSL.

20. Whatever The Liquid Is Inside A Tide Pod

Is it bleach? Will it kill me? But I wouldn't have to drink a PSL? If you answered yes to all of these then...worth it.

21. Live Wasps

Okay, so like this might be a tad dramatic, but it's not not true.

22. Literally Any Other Thing On The Starbucks Menu

Chai Tea Latte, Caramel Macchiato, Peppermint Mocha, Vanilla Latte, White Mocha, Java Chip Frappuccino, Pink Drink, Iced Coffee, Straight Espresso, Water, Chocolate Smoothie (yep, I meant smoothie.) The list goes on and on. Do yourself a favor and save the five bucks that you'd spend on the drink that somewhat resembles the outcome of milking a cinnamon pumpkin.