Ahh yes, the beautiful world of Facebook.

You love it, you hate it, but you still scroll through it as a last resort every night after you’ve checked all your other favorite social media apps (Instagram, I see you). I know that for me, I have about a million different thoughts that go through my head when I’m wandering around good ol' Facebook. Some are nice, some are… well, not as nice, and some just leave me a bit speechless.

Regardless, I’ll probably continue stalking Facebook when it’s 2 a.m. and I’m bored, because OF COURSE I WANT TO WATCH A VIDEO OF A CUTE PUPPY ROLLING DOWN A HILL.

So, lets begin.

1. Ah, they finally got engaged. That’s cute.

2. Stop posting about your relationship issues.

We get it, Chad is a grade A jerk.

3. She got an internship? But she’s younger than me? Great.

Guess I should start applying myself or something.

4. Oh my gosh that looks so good. I’ll go ahead and save that video for later and make it!

(I would never make it.)

5. Oh, someone else is getting married? I mean, okay. I’m happy for them. I’m sure I’ll find someone too, at some point.

6. Hey look! My mom tagged me in a post with an inspirational quote. Thanks, mom.

7. Political opinions? YES. MY FAVORITE. YOU ARE DEFINITELY GOING TO CHANGE MY MIND.

8. They’re having a baby? Didn’t they just get married? I can’t even get a match on Tinder. Cool.

9. Wow, this DIY video is so smart. I totally could’ve thought of that. I’ll go ahead and save that video too. I’ll TOTALLY use it.

(Again, I never use it.)

10. Oh cool. My sister tagged me in a photo from 2011. Why did I think I needed that much eyeliner? And bangs? Thanks for reminding me about that, sis.

11. Another engagement? Awesome. Lovely. Cool. I’m going to live alone at this point.

12. OH MY GOSH, THE OL’ RAZZLE DAZZLE. YES.

13. Stop talking. You should not be allowed to have Facebook. Please. For the love of everything good.

14. Another person has made a page for their photography? That’s only like the 600th person on my feed who has now taken up that hobby ~professionally~.

15. ANOTHER POST? Thanks mom. That’s about the 5th one you’ve tagged me in today.

I get it. If they can’t handle me at my worst, then they TOTALLY don’t deserve me at my best.

16. Memes. Memes. Memes. Memes.

17. More babies on the way. Lovely.

18. Is that cat playing in a box? OH MY GOSH. THAT’S SO CUTE.

I’M NOT CRYING, YOU’RE CRYING.

19. Ahh, another relationship is now Facebook official. S’cute.

Annnnnd I’m still single.

20. Omg prime rib with garlic herb butter? Yep. Saving that video.

Gosh, I’m going to be a cooking genius. Thanks, Facebook.

21. Hmm… I should probably stalk my ex from high school now.