The service industry tends to wear its victims down pretty fast in fairly discernible ways. First, your usually chipper "how can I help you?" demeanor slowly dissipates, until all that's left are the faint remnants of a mumbled "hi". Once you've exchanged general pleasantry with impassiveness, you begin to find yourself becoming irrationally irritated by the most minute of annoyances. Things that once momentarily bothered you begin to send you into full-blown temper tantrums; you're irate, endlessly bothered, and frankly, could give two shits less about whether your customer had a bad day or not.

So I'm here, you're not-so-friendly cashier, to tell you to just stop doing these 10 things. And I'm not going to say please.

~Cue the angst and pent up aggression.


1. Asking for a bag for just a few items.

Do myself, the environment, and that kitchen drawer you inevitably have in your house that is just bursting with plastic bags a favor and carry your items. There is a reason we have hands, and it isn't just for holding the smart phone you haven't looked up from once since the transaction began.

Which brings me to my next point....

2. Talking on the phone during your transaction.

It's rude, distracting, and frankly, I don't want to hear about how parent teacher conferences went, Susan.

3. Openly arguing with your significant other, family member, or friend about whose paying.

Nothing is worse than when you have three people flinging credit cards at you at once in the midst of yelling. Figure that out before you approach the register and keep me out of your family squabble.

4. Joking about items being free if it doesn't ring in right away.

Nice one... it's not like I've heard that same joke 19086747 times before.

5. Making jokes about our age.

"Are you even old enough to ring in alcohol?"

"I didn't know they hired fifteen year olds here!"

"So what grade are you in? Tenth?"

6. Bringing a cart up to the register but leaving without it.

Haven't you ever heard of putting things back wherever you found them? C'mon Becky.

7. Telling us to 'hurry up' because you're in a hurry.

It's not my fault that you planned poorly or left your house late, Colleen. But now that you've said something.... I'm going to make sure to take my time. Oh? You gave me a $5 bill, let me go ahead and check if its counterfeit real quick. You want a bag? Okay, I'm going to pretend like I don't know how to open it up for about two minutes.

Bottom line: no one likes an impatient person.

8. Telling us how to do our jobs.


I work at a grocery store, so I'm constantly instructed on how to do my job by customer who think they know everything. Whether it be "don't put the cleaning products with my food!" or "don't put the heavy stuff on top of the eggs and bread."

Look lady, I know how to do my job, I wasn't going to do either of those things anyway.

9. Talking down to us.

Look, I realize this job is not glamorous, but we all have to start somewhere. And for me, this somewhere is here.

10. Arguing with us over things we can't control.

Example: prices. I don't make them, so stop yelling at me over how expensive your asparagus was. Also, no amount of whining is going to make me change the price.

11. COUPONS!!

"My coupon expired. Will you still take it?"

"I left my coupon at home, but will you still give me the discount?"

"Why don't you take competitor's coupons? Other stores do."

"I didn't grab the exact item on the item, but it's close enough, so will you still give me the discount?"

No. No. I don't care. And why would you even ask that???

12. Giving us a $100 bill for a $2 total when you have smaller bills.

If you only have big bills, I'll understand. I'll probably still sigh in angry frustration when I'm counting back your bills, but I'll try to understand. However, if you just choose to skip over the smaller bills in your hand and go straight for the $100, I'm going to be pissed, and you're going to know it. Stores are not banks and there's only so much money that we have in our drawers, so stop making us break your bills.

13. When you ambiguously ask for something.

"Can I have water?"

Okay, would you like a gallon or a case? And what brand?

"Drinking water."

Okay, but which brand?

"The one that's $2 something."

WHICH ONE????

"WATER. I WANT WATER."

Yes, this actually happens.

14. When you walk into the store minutes before it closes.

Oh, it's fine, I'll stay late so you can get the ice cream you had ALL DAY to get. No big deal.

15. Having us get our managers when you don't like what we've told you.

I guess the words uttered from my peasant mouth cannot be trusted. But sure, I'll get my manager. He's just going to say the exact same thing....