15 'Ned's Declassified' Tips That Still Work In College

15 'Ned's Declassified' Tips That Still Work In College

Tip #334.3F — When you're sitting with your friends, you are at the cool table

We all know and love the classic Nickelodeon show "Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide," but have we taken enough time to really look at the tips? In honor of college students everywhere struggling here are 15 of "Ned's Declassified" tips that are just as relevant in college.

1. Tip #305F - Stay together with electives

The Middle School (ahem, college) system will separate you from your friends but you can use your electives to stay together at least once. Plan ahead: pick the same class. It's simple.

2. Tip #503.B - Be ready for surprises

I guess the only way to be really ready for the first day is to realize that nobody's ready.

3. Tip #320A - No class is ever full

No class is ever "full," it just reaches capacity. And to get in, all you need is Tip #320B.

4. Tip #320B - Get teacher approval

Get teacher approval. And a decent speech.

5. Tip #112 - Do whatever you can to stay awake

The Boring Teacher: Always have something in handy that can keep you and the class awake.

6. Tip #338.XU - Don't kiss up, do the work

I know it doesn't feel like it but teachers are people too and if you just do the work or at least try in class, you'll be amazed how much your grades shoot up.

7. Tip #334.3F - When you're sitting with your friends, you are at the cool table

When you're sitting with your friends, you are at the cool table.

8. Tip #987.4 - Home sick? Ask a friend for notes

Avoid falling behind in class and get a classmate to make copies of notes from the days you miss. But make sure that person takes good notes. Or better yet, get someone to video tape the class.

9. Tip #308 - If you're on the wrong end of a rumor, IGNORE IT!

If you're on the wrong end of a rumor, don't panic, just ignore it.

10. Tip #312 - Don't believe rumors and don't spread them

Rumors. Sometimes they're fun but usually they are nothing but trouble. So don't believe them and don't spread them.

11. Double Dating = Less Pressure

Avoid awkward silences with double dating.

12. Ask your teacher about tutor options

Don't beat yourself up. If you have a tutor, it doesn't mean you're dumb.

13. If you fail, don't overreact

Talk to your Guidance Counselor (or adviser, or professor, or TA) for advice on how to pass.

14. Don't get in the way of 8th graders

Walk with your friends in dangerous zones (away from eighth graders and actual college dangers).

15. Tip #309.8.2 - Have fun, don't have super-high expectations and go with the flow

THE FINAL AND MOST IMPORTANT TIP EVER (which was technically Moze's tip all along) Have fun. Don't have super-high expectations and go with the flow.

Cover Image Credit: Nickelodeon Productions

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To The Teacher Who Was So Much More

Thank you for everything

I think it's fair to say that most people remember at least one teacher who had a lasting impact on them. I have been incredibly lucky to have several teachers who I will never forget, but one individual takes the cake. So here's to you: thank you for all you have done.

Thank you for teaching me lessons not just in the textbook.

Although you taught a great lecture, class was never just limited to the contents of the course. Debates and somewhat heated conversations would arise between classmates over politics and course material, and you always encouraged open discussion. You embraced the idea of always having an opinion, and always making it be heard, because why waste your voice? You taught me to fight for things I believed in, and to hold my ground in an argument. You taught me to always think of others before doing and speaking. You showed me the power of kindness. Thank you for all the important lessons that may not have been included in the curriculum.

Thank you for believing in me.

Especially in my senior year, you believed in me when other teachers didn't. You showed me just what I could accomplish with a positive and strong attitude. Your unwavering support kept me going, especially when I melted into a puddle of tears weekly in your office. You listened to my stupid complaints, understood my overwhelming stress-induced breakdowns, and told me it was going to be okay. Thank you for always being there for me.

Thank you for inspiring me.

You are the epitome of a role model. Not only are you intelligent and respected, but you have a heart of gold and emit beautiful light where ever you go. You showed me that service to others should not be looked at as a chore, but something to enjoy and find yourself in. And I have found myself in giving back to people, thanks to your spark. Thank you for showing me, and so many students, just how incredible one person can be.

Thank you for changing my life.

Without you, I truly would not be where I am today. As cliche as it sounds, you had such a remarkable impact on me and my outlook on life. Just about a year has passed since my graduation, and I'm grateful to still keep in touch. I hope you understand the impact you have made on me, and on so many other students. You are amazing, and I thank you for all you have done.

Cover Image Credit: Amy Aroune

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5 things bisexual people are So tired of hearing From Cis-Hets

Too many people can't wrap their head around the concept of bisexuality, and it's getting old.


The Merriam-Webster definition of bisexuality: sexual or romantic attraction to members of both sexes; also: engaging in sexual activity with partners of more than one gender. Yet, this can often be a very confusing concept for certain people to understand. As a result, people who identify openly as bisexual are often subjected to a slew of frustrating questions and statements that have grown tiring. So here is a list of just a handful of them.

1. "So, you're straight now?"


So, as the definition implies, bisexuals typically like both men and women. So, if you are a bisexual woman, and you are dating a man, no, that does not mean that you are straight now. You are still bisexual, you are just in a relationship with a man at the moment. Please, stop asking this.

2. "So, you're gay now?"


Okay, so, this is the flip side of the previous question, yes, but it needs to be said because of the frequency of its utterance. If a bisexual man is in a relationship with a man, he is not "gay now". He is still bisexual, again. He is just in a relationship with a man. Regardless of whether or not a bisexual person is in a same-sex or different-sex relationship, they remain, and will always remain bisexual. So, let's just put this question and the former question to rest.

3. "Do you have sex with everyone and anyone?"


Bisexuality does not equal sexual deviancy. Just because a bisexual person can fall in love with or have a sexual relationship with a person of any gender does not mean that they will have sex with literally any human being who offers. No, they will not have sex with anyone just because they can. That is not how it works.

4. "Will you have a threesome with me and my boyfriend/girlfriend?"


NO. No, no, no. Just because a bisexual person will have sex with someone of either gender does not mean that they want to have sex with you and your significant other at the same time. Please, stop asking your bisexual friends and acquaintances to jump into bed with you and your boyfriend or girlfriend just to spice things up in the bedroom. It's extremely rude and presumptuous. Bisexual people are not your sexual fantasy or your sexual fantasy come true.

5. "Bisexuals are just selfish/looking for attention."


People always say that most bisexuals are just pretending to be bisexual for attention and that they aren't genuinely attracted to more than one gender. This is a fallacy. Stop accusing young bisexuals of playing pretend or going through a phase. Bisexuals are valid. They're sick of hearing these erasure comments. It's also constantly implied that bisexuals are just being selfish/greedy. That is not the case, and this belief system needs to be destroyed and done away with immediately. As stated before, bisexuals are not these inherently sexually crazed lunatics. Being attracted to more than one gender does not automatically equate to sex with everyone. Bisexuals are not greedy nymphomaniacs who just want to have as much sex as they can for themselves.

There are numerous other frustrating comments and questions that bisexuals get bombarded with on the daily. This is just a select few that stand out. So, please, if you are someone who says these things, stop. If you have heard someone say these things, or you hear them say any variation of these things in the future, please, correct them. We all need to make a conscious effort to stop this close-minded conversation to continue.

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