I’ve been a cashier at Michaels Arts and Crafts for about two years. Some days are definitely better than others to say the least and I’ve met a lot of interesting customers. All in all though, I like my job and the people I work with. Here are just some of the things I hear on a daily basis from working in retail.

1. Are you open?

No, my light is just on and I’m standing at an empty counter for fun. What’s even worse than this question is when a customer says “you look bored” and then proceeds to dump two carts full of stuff on your counter.

2. Do you work here?

After blankly staring at the customer for probably a minute, and politely saying “yes, how can I help you,” what I’m really thinking is “No, I just like to wear this bright red, bulky vest because I think it’s fashionable.”

3. I’d like to talk with your manager.

I understand that I’m just a cashier and that it doesn’t seem like I would know a lot about where I work, but my manager was the one who trained me. Therefore, I was trained to give you the same answers and options my manager would give you. BUT, I will gladly let you argue with my manager instead of me.

4. Nothing.

Nothing is worse than being in a good mood at work (a rare occasion) and greeting your customer with a nice, “hello how are you?” only to get no response back. Nothing. Not even a smile. Okay, well sorry for being nice and so much for having a good day at work.

5. Aisle 10 is very messy, you should have one of your associates clean it.

First of all, they’re not my associates. Second of all, they’ll get right on it. Right after they finish running around the store looking for items that other customers need and cleaning up everywhere else after them.

6. I have a coupon.

The four dreaded words of working in retail. Nothing is worse than having a line halfway through the store because you have to wait for your one customer to look through their phone, wallet, bag, phone...wherever just to use one coupon that’ll save them 50 cents.

7. What time do you open?

*deep breaths* We open at 9 and close at 9. The same, exact time we open and close every other day.

8. Is it green or red for credit?

It says right on the screen in front of you. We even color coded it to make it easier to read.

9. Are you sure that’s the right price? The sign said this…..

I am 99.999% sure that yes, that is the right price. I do not determine the prices nor do I put the sale signs up. But one thing that’s for sure is that the registers are programmed to have the correct prices. So yes, that item you want is a whole $2 more than what you thought.

10. Can’t you check to see if there’s one in the back?

For some reason, customers always think that the warehouse is this magical place where we can go back and magically re-appear with whatever they’re looking for.

11. Sorry, but this $100 bill is all I have.

Okay that’s fine. Just give me one minute to count your $97 in change.

12. Can you just wait one minute? I forgot to grab one thing.

10 years later they come back with not one, but another whole basket full of things.

13. *8:58* *Store closes at 9* *Customer comes running in: “I’ll be really quick.”

Nothing beats the customers who come in literally 30 seconds before you lock the door and end up shopping for 20 minutes past closing. I mean, like, it’s not like us workers have lives outside of work or anything.