If you're one of these people, you know you are and you're not the slightest bit ashamed to proclaim the title of "overly conscious driver". In fact, you take the title and make it your own. Despite all of the haters who get irritated with your careful ways, you remain confident that in retrospect it will all pay off. Here are 12 things that all overly conscious drivers know to be way too true.
1. You get personally offended when someone passes you
Who would ever have the audacity to do such a thing to you? What you want to do is jump out of your vehicle and scream "who do you think you are?!", but what you actually do is remain silent while feeling extremely butthurt and sorry for yourself. Not to mention, you can't help but feel bitter as you manage to completely overthink the situation and ask the world, "WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?".
2. You become unnecessarily insecure about your windshield wiper speed
Once you start noticing the speed of other drivers' windshield wipers on a rainy day, it can be hard to ignore. In fact, it can almost eat away at you. Especially when yours are on a noticeably faster speed than the ones of those around you. The last thing you want is to appear dramatic by having your windshield wipers on a higher speed than what is reasonable for the current weather conditions (even though in reality, no one cares about your windshield wiper speed). Before you know it, you're observing the wiper speeds of every car that passes by and comparing them to yours.
3. Driving in small and/or crowded parking lots is a traumatic experience in your book
If a car could experience the feeling of claustrophobia, this would be the time. Your heart skips a beat every time a car perpendicular to you starts to creep out of their parking spot. This is a scene for nothing but tragedy and disaster.
4. You panic at the first drop of rain
You highly contemplate calling it quits, turning on your hazards and pulling into the ditch on the side of the road after the sight of one raindrop. Driving in rain storms that have clouded your vision of the road in the past has left you with an inevitable case of PTSD.
5. You automatically feel like a convict every time you pass a cop
Every time you drive past a cop while going five mph (or less) over the speed limit you mentally prepare your "ok just put the handcuffs on me and take me away" speech. Even if you are fully aware that you are doing nothing wrong, you become overwhelmed with a sensation of guilt for a crime you didn't commit until the cop is out of sight and out of mind.
6. Driving past semis on the interstate gives you the same adrenaline rush that a high-speed car chase probably would
The slightest gust of wind leaves you convinced that the semi is about to swerve into your lane during the process and with that, you prepare to meet your maker. After you finally build up the courage to pass the giant monstrosity that is causing a great inconvenience to you and your road trip, you give yourself a pat on the back for the true act of courage that you have just endeavored.
7. You can't help but be a terrible "backseat driver" when someone else is behind the wheel
You never hesitate to enlighten others with your knowledge of the rules of the road (or you're just trying to prevent the driver from killing you both). You're the person that everyone hates to have in their passenger seat but it's ok because someday they'll realize they may have learned a thing or two from you.
8. You can never commit to passing the slow car in front of you
Just as you start to creep up on them, something in your head keeps holding you back. There could be no cars in sight heading the opposite direction for miles, yet you still think of all the things that could go wrong if you decide to take that step of assertation.
9. You naturally spew multiple profane phrases every time you hit the road
Driving changes you. The second you get behind the wheel you become a hostile and angry person with zero patience and an immense hate for humanity. The smallest error in someone's driving leaves you with some serious road rage.
10. You tend to leave for your destination extremely early because you never know what conditions you might run into
You are never running late because of the permanent anticipation that is installed in your mind. You are constantly prepared for whatever obstacles the roads may throw your way. Traffic jam? Natural disaster? Zombie apocolypse? Whatever the case may be, you are still guaranteed to arrive at your destination on time.
11. Everything that happens is someone else's fault
You are formally known as the angel of the highways (in your own mind). When it comes to driving, you can do no wrong. Some may call it narcissism, others call it perfection.
12. You're proud of the paranoid, frantic driver that you are
Even though you cause yourself a compulsive amount of stress, it's all worth it at the end of the day. After seeing how careless some drivers are, you can rest assured knowing that regardless of the panic attacks, periodical episodes of road rage and concern for your well-being, you survived another day on the road.
If you highly identified with all of these, congratulations, your driving skills are executed to a tee. If there is one thing that will always ring true to you it's that consistency is key. Next time someone decides to question you about your driving habits, simply ask them why you should fix something that was never broken.