Allergies suck. I don't mean the slight sniffles that some Allegra will clear up. I don't mean the one week flu at the change of the season. I mean the allergies that never go away. I mean the ones the keep people form enjoying life. But the worst part is how uninformed the blessed individuals who can breathe through their nose are. So here's my list of annoying things people say to me in regards to my allergies.
1. "Do you smell that?"
NO. I don't. The last time my sinuses were clear enough to smell burning things in the distance was the last time I took a round of steroids, prescribed by a doctor.
2. "Did you take medicine?"
Yes. I take four different kinds and none of them a do a darn thing.
3. "But wait, antihistamines are supposed to work, aren't they?"
Yes, too bad I'm allergic to the air I breathe. I'd have to breathe in antihistamines to balance with the allergens I'm taking in.
4. "Woah, are you sick? Stay away from me."
No, jerk. I just sneezed. MY BAD.
5. "Why are you crying?"
Actually, people usually cry out of both eyes, not just one.
6. "The sounds you make when you blow your nose are honestly so disgusting."
Wow, THANKS. It only took me 17 years to be comfortable enough to blow it anywhere near anyone else.
7. "Oh shoot, I forgot you were allergic to cats, are you OK?"
Yeah, no, thanks for the warning. I'll just try not to breathe anytime soon.
8. "Why do you even have a dog if it makes you so miserable?"
Because I was a dumb 13-year-old who got cut from the volleyball team. I NEEDED that puppy and it breaks my heart that I can't be a better owner to her. Please stop reminding me I suck.
9. "I don't know why you are sneezing, my house is so clean."
Obviously not clean enough, bud.
10. "Smell these flowers!"
No thanks. I'd rather shove a fork in my eye.
11. "Babe, did I put too much cologne on?"
How the hell should I know?
Again I say, allergies suck. There's nothing fun about avoiding precious pups and moderately cute cats or telling guys you don't like getting flowers. It's hard to wake up on the right side of the bed with your eyes are shut and it's equally as awful when you run out of tissues during an exam. It's disheartening to take nasal sprays, eye drops, antihistamines, inhalers and the like pointlessly just to feel like your doing something. So maybe next time your friend has some allergies try to be polite and maybe even accommodating. We congested people appreciate it.