11 Fun Facts About Eating Disorders That No One Tells You

11 Fun Facts About Eating Disorders That No One Tells You

I never thought it could happen to me, either.
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I never thought that I had an eating disorder until that beautiful chart at the psychologist's office told me differently. I never thought that I hated my body enough for it to become damaging to my health. I never thought that I would live each day in fear that I would eat too much, just to make myself sick again. I never thought that this would impact me to the point that I hated getting out of bed, looking at my friends, or socializing with the people I loved. I never expected any of this to happen to me because no one has ever warned me.

1. Your hair falls out.

Not only does it fall out, it also knots extremely quickly. Your hair becomes super thin that your entire head of hair could be equivalent to your best friend's bangs. You will notice this when you are doing her hair for her and it will break your heart.

2. You are tired constantly.

Forget about sleeping. Those stomach pains will keep you up all night. If you lay down the wrong way, just expect your body to feel like there are knives stabbing you.

3. Mirrors become your worst enemies.

You really hate what you see. Even in the morning, when you apparently weigh less, you will still hate that figure that you see. Your eyes become dark and sunken in. You will hold the fat on your body and squeeze it, hoping that you can rip it off and forget about it. You will look dead. You will be a zombie. You will hate that mirror.

4. The only thing worse than a mirror is a scale.

Scales are forbidden words. If you have one in your house, you can bet that you will check your weight obsessively. If you eat too much for a meal, you will find yourself on top of it, then you will find yourself doing your method of getting rid of that "weight".

5. Your friends and family will notice you don't eat enough.

They will start to ask you if you ate today. They will see your mood change. They will realize that you are melting away to nothing. They can sense how drained you are.

6. You develop tiny holes in your stomach.

Your doctors will tell you that these are just ulcers from stress, but you know what you're doing to yourself. Prepare to have to lie to dozens of people why you're on so much medication.

7. You stop getting your period.

If your eating disorder gets to this point, you have to live with the worry of "why is this happening to me". You will never know when or if your period will come. Understand that you now need to carry some sort of feminine product with you at all times because the "time" of the month becomes a guessing game.

8. Your stomach acid eats your teeth away.

Your teeth become extremely sensitive to hot and cold. Brushing your teeth starts to hurt. You need to be careful with hot tea, or a drink with ice. Toothaches become a regular thing.

9. You get sick from any kind of food even when you're having a good day.

You will have good days that you feel great about yourself and you want to treat yourself to a snack because you think that you deserve it. You will get sick anyway. You will develop numerous sensitivities to your favorite foods.

10. Your clothes will never look good on you again.

Shopping becomes a traumatizing experience rather than a fun and relaxing time with your friends. You begin to shop for clothes that are just too big so that no one will notice your weight loss/weight gain. You hide yourself in your clothes. They become security blankets, not fashion statements.

11. Eating disorders never go away.

Just when you think that you are healed, they come back to bite you again.

If you can relate to this, I want to tell you that there is help out there. There are millions of people just like you who need special care and support. The first step is accepting that even though you "never thought this could happen to you", it did, and there are people out here to help you cope.

Cover Image Credit: http://spoonuniversity.com/lifestyle/eating-disorder-didnt-know/

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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Please Know That Being Diagnosed With PCOS Is Not The Same As Living With It

I was diagnosed with PCOS in 2018, but it wasn't until months later that I realized what it’s actually like living with it everyday.

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In October 2017, tired of counting calories and never seeing the scale move, I decided to try the latest fad diet: Keto.

It worked.

I lost almost 40 pounds in half the time it had taken to lose 20. I had lost nearly 10 inches from waist and hips. I went from a size 18 to a size 12.

Getting into ketosis was hard, but once I was there, I felt incredible: better mental clarity and focus, astronomical amounts of energy, regular body functions. Don't get me wrong, this diet is hard. No carbs, no colorful vegetables, no pasta. The struggle was real. But what it was doing for my body was worth it.

Except for one little thing: my periods had lost their minds. I'm talking bleeding for three weeks straight, no break. Coming and going in particular pattern, sometimes twice a month. Side note: this is not normal. In the world of Keto, it's supposed to help exponentially with fertility and hormone balances; people use this diet as a way to reverse hormone imbalances, PCOS, and infertility. This was virtually unheard of in all of my support groups.

Months and months go by with no relief. My doctor can't figure out why everything is so wonky. She takes me off the pill and things get better - slightly. Any improvement at this point was a victory.

She finally gets my ultrasounds back and she says "Well that's a surprise!" Cue my questioning look of confusion. "Umm care to share?" "Your ovaries have the characteristic look of PCOS. But you don't have any of the usual symptoms. I'm guessing the Keto diet was helping in it's own way. I recommend staying on the diet, let nature re-regulate your natural hormones, and we will re-evaluate in a few months."

I was frustrated, but this was totally do-able. I had been living this lifestyle for months, so I didn't foresee it as an issue. But then my kidneys starting reacting to the diet, and that doctor recommended I come off it. Obviously I wasn't going to jeopardize my health, so I started a low carb version of the Mediterranean diet.

I went in fully expecting to gain some weight back, because I was reintroducing carbs when I had gone largely without them for over a year. I knew that this would happen, and I didn't let myself get discouraged when the scale started going forward.

What I did not expect was to have my PCOS start running lose with my entire life and sanity.

Don't get me wrong — my periods were normal again, but everything else went AWOL. My hormones were going up and down of their own volition, we are talking sobbing hysterically over a butterfly commercial one minute and then fuming with anger over a car ad the next.

I started experiencing pelvic pain that feels like cramps only not all the time and without rhyme or reason.

My hair became uncontrollably oily to the point where I had to wash it everyday like clockwork; it started to thin and fall out.

I also started getting darker hair everywhere. I'm naturally an incredibly fair-skinned person so having black hair anywhere stands out like a sore thumb.

I felt like I wasn't in control of anything going on with my body. I felt like a hairy, unattractive monster. Everything that made me feel attractive and desirable was slowly being taken away from me piece by piece.

I had been living with PCOS for nearly six months, but I hadn't realized what it was like to actually live with it. I thought it was just irregular periods, but it is so much more than just a weird period.

I went back to the doctor, and she explained to me again how PCOS works, and how she didn't think traditional treatment options were the best thing for me. "Go back on the Keto diet. You were having incredible success with managing your symptoms. Go back to that."

Going back has not been easy. When I first started Keto, it wasn't easy, but I got into it quickly. I've been trying since January 12th to get back into it, and it hasn't worked.

I'm now in a place where I need to do it — for my health, for my sanity, for my self-esteem — and I physically can't. I do exactly everything the same as before, and it's not working. I'm trying to move away from the mentality of doing it for weight loss, and move toward positive thinking about how it's what's best for my body and my health.

My PCOS has forced me to have militant control over everything I eat. I can't simply enjoy food anymore. Everything that I chose to eat directly relates back to my PCOS and what that particular food can do for me. I think about everything that I put into my body, and the potential it has for either healing my body or harming it.

I see a piece of cake and I smell it, and picture in my mind what it tastes like. But I know that if I eat that piece of cake, I will bloat, get a stomach ache, and have to start back from square one the next day.

I cut out the carbs. I say no to cake. No potatoes. No pasta. I eat only green vegetables. I drink coffee that has nothing but heavy cream. I try to do intermittent fasting for 15 hours a day.

And I hope that it works. I hope that today will be the day I can get my life back on track. That today will be the day Keto works its magic.

I hope.

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