100 Things I'd Rather Do Than Lose To The Gators

100 Things I'd Rather Do Than Lose To The Gators

We some dogs, we ain't no gator bait
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Saying that all of us Seminoles have faced defeat is an understatement. We've lost to Louisville, had our dreams crushed when we played Clemson and even failed when we were up against North Carolina (at least we didn't lose to Miami ha ha sucks to be u). I know I can speak for all of us when I say that I have had it with defeat. As the game against UF draws near, I decided to reflect on all of the things that I'd rather do than lose again, specifically to the gators:


1) Hear the word "moist."

2) Have my first dance at my wedding be to "What Does the Fox Say."

3) Eat soup with a fork.

4) Sit in traffic on Tennessee Street for 24 hours.5) Stick my tongue on the freezer aisle.

6) Literally shit a brick.

7) Be allergic to Chipotle.

8) Shave my eyebrows.

9) Slam my hand in a car door.

10) Sleep through a final exam.

11) Have the Walking Dead be real.

12) Have someone ask me if I'm pregnant when I'm just fat.

13) Get a mohawk.

14) Be lactose intolerant.

15) Live in Smith Hall for the rest of my college career.

16) Do the Cinnamon Challenge.

17) Only drink mind erasers on my 21st birthday.

18) Run on the treadmill.

19) Eat anchovies.

20) Cut off my finger with a potato peeler.

21) Wear red underwear with white pants.

22) Step on a Lego.

23) Be 2007 Brittany.

24) Get a tattoo of a gator on my face.

25) Poop in a public bathroom.

26) Eat a sandwich off of the floor of Coli.

27) Get fitted for a retainer for 3 hours.

28) Drink unsweet tea.

29) Staple my thumb.

30) Get tapeworms.

31) Wait in the Chipotle line on Tennessee Street.

32) Have my ringtone be Nickelback.

33) Only drink salt water for the rest of my life.

34) Eat tobacco dip.

35) Have Moe's run out of queso.

36) Get "no ragrats" tattooed on my chest.

37) Have Dalvin Cook play for the gators.

38) Get an M.I.P.

39) Have my skin tone be as orange as Donald Trump's.

40) Get a never ending nose bleed.

41) Only listen to "Friday" by Rebecca Black for the rest of my life.

42) Run out of gas on the highway.

43) Have my hair turn red when I was going for a "honey mist auburn."

44) Never turn 21.

45) Have Voldemort's nose.

46) Drink bleach.

47) Eat half cooked pasta.

48) Watch a 24 hour video on how to knit.

49) Touch the metal part of a seat belt on a hot Florida day.

50) Drive a Kia Soul.


51) Take an 8am class.

52) And actually go to it.

53) Take care of a Tamagotchi.

54) Eat sand.

55) Get an enema.

56) Work on Black Friday.

57) Run the PR department for the Cincinnati Zoo.58) Sort Forever 21 by color.

59) Watch paint dry.

60) Transfer to Miami.

61) Have there always be an Uber surge.

62) Get Swine Flu.

63) Watch a movie on the Hallmark channel.

64) Have my roommate practice the violin everyday.

65) Put my head in the oven.

66) Use lemon juice for eye drops.

67) Make my bed.

68) Have my umbrella break walking across campus during Hurricane Hermine (again).

69) Drink nail polish remover.

70) Find parking on campus.

71) Have the entire football team be out due to Hand Foot Mouth Disease.

72) Eat a microwaveable meal that's still frozen in the middle.

73) Think that the push/pull door at the grocery store is automatic and stand there waiting for it to open on its own.

74) Watch Marley and Me.

75) Have my mom accidentally donate the wrong box of my childhood memories to a daycare like in Toy Story 3.

76) Awkwardly be in the same room as your friend when she's fighting with her parents.

77) Study organic chemistry.

78) Be eaten by the Alaskan Bull Worm.

79) Clean the floor of standard with a single Clorox wipe.

80) Go to lunch with all of my exes at once.

81) Have a Motorola Razr.

82) Have Gumby's accidentally bring me a salad for dinner after a day of recruitment (again).

83) Read my myspace posts from the 7th grade.

84) See a clown on campus.

85) Have Siri talk in the middle of a silent lecture of 150 people.

86) Screenshot a conversation and accidentally send it to that person.

87) Buy textbooks.

88) Hit every red light on Tennessee Street.

89) Wear a perfume that smells like burnt popcorn everyday for the rest of my life.

90) Type a 10 page research paper with my elbows.

91) Have my hair look like Hilary Clinton's.

92) Accidentally like my enemies picture on Instagram from 68 weeks ago.

93) Never be allowed to wear leggings or athletic shorts to class again.

94) Own one pair of shoes and have them be New Balance tennis shoes that nerdy dads wear.

95) Only shop at the Limited Too.

96) Eat burnt Olive Garden bread sticks.

97) Be Taylor Swift when Kayne stole her speech.

98) Get asked "is Pepsi okay?" when I ask for Coke.

99) Have my hair permanently look like Cindy Lou from The Grinch.

100) Be a gator.


Cover Image Credit: trblmg.com

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To The Coach Who Ruined The Game For Me

We can't blame you completely, but no one has ever stood up to you before.
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I know you never gave it a second thought, the idea that you're the reason I and many others, never went any farther in our athletic careers.

I know you didn’t sincerely care about our mental health, as long as we were physically healthy and our bodies were working enough to play. It’s obvious your calling wasn’t coaching and you weren’t meant to work with young adults, some who look to you as a parent figure or a confidant.

I also know that if we were to express our concerns about the empty feeling we began to feel when we stepped onto the court, you wouldn’t have taken the conversation seriously because it wasn’t your problem.

I know we can't blame you completely, no one has ever stood up to you before. No one said anything when girls would spend their time in the locker room crying because of something that was said or when half the team considered quitting because it was just too much.

We can't get mad at the obvious favoritism because that’s how sports are played.

Politics plays a huge role and if you want playing time, you have to know who to befriend. We CAN get mad at the obvious mistreatment, the empty threats, the verbal abuse, “it's not what you say, its how you say it.”

We can get mad because a sport that we loved so deeply and had such passion for, was taken away from us single-handedly by an adult who does not care. I know a paycheck meant more to you than our wellbeing, and I know in a few years you probably won’t even remember who we are, but we will always remember.

We will remember how excited we used to get on game days and how passionate we were when we played. How we wanted to continue on with our athletic careers to the next level when playing was actually fun. We will also always remember the sly remarks, the obvious dislike from the one person who was supposed to support and encourage us.

We will always remember the day things began to change and our love for the game started to fade.

I hope that one day, for the sake of the young athletes who still have a passion for what they do, you change.

I hope those same athletes walk into practice excited for the day, to get better and improve, instead of walking in with anxiety and worrying about how much trouble they would get into that day. I hope those athletes play their game and don’t hold back when doing it, instead of playing safe, too afraid to get pulled and benched the rest of the season.

I hope they form an incredible bond with you, the kind of bond they tell their future children about, “That’s the coach who made a difference for me when I was growing up, she’s the reason I continued to play.”

I don’t blame you for everything that happened, we all made choices. I just hope that one day, you realize that what you're doing isn’t working. I hope you realize that before any more athletes get to the point of hating the game they once loved.

To the coach that ruined the game for me, I hope you change.

Cover Image Credit: Author's photo

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If You Have 20/20 Vision, You Can’t See These 10 Annoying Problems Anyone Who Wears Glasses Can

Forget plastic surgery. I want lasik eye surgery.

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Being "blind" is not fun, and it's not for everyone. I started wearing glasses in the 3rd grade and I tried everything to avoid getting them. That whole "carrots are good for your eyes" thing is totally a lie! I ate so many carrots thinking it was going to help but it did nothing. Having glasses is super annoying and I'm about to tell you why...

1. They get dirty so fast.

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Honestly I feel like I'm always cleaning them.

2. People always want to try them on.

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Then, even worse, they hit you with the, "Wow, you really can't see". Uhhh no Susan I can't.

3. You can't lay down in them.

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Whenever you lay on your side, your glasses do the thing.

4. Once you put them down, you can't find them.

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If I'm wearing contacts and I'm doing my makeup, I'll throw my glasses on my bed and then have to feel around for them.

5.  You can't wear cute sunglasses.

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Double glasses is a major no.

6. You can't see what you look like when you're picking out new ones.

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Reasons my glasses have not always been the cutest.

7. You miss spots when you shave.

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The struggle is real when you're trying to shave and you can't even see two inches in front of you.

8. Swimming...

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Either you swim blind or you swim with the risk of breaking and/or losing your glasses

9. Getting asked why you don't wear contacts.

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Because I work at 3 and 4 a.m. or I have class at 8 a.m. Contacts are for special events because I'm lazy.

10. The eye doctors.

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Okay, so the eye doctor actually isn't bad, but you have to go over every time you start to squint your eyes, which for me is every 6 months.

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