10 Things All 'Overweight' Girls Need Let Weigh On Their Mind
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10 Things All 'Overweight' Girls Need Let Weigh On Their Mind

Young, old and in between: there is not enough self love help out there. Hopefully this helps those who need it most.

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10 Things All 'Overweight' Girls Need Let Weigh On Their Mind
Pixabay

All of my life I have struggled with my weight.

I have never been skinny, small, thin, or however, you would like to word it. As a child, I was thicker than everyone else. I had thicker thighs, arms, a bigger stomach, and a chubbier face. I was short and stocky.

I never really noticed until I got a bit older and would start comparing myself to other girls, noticing that they looked different than I did.

To this day, nothing has changed. I have large thighs, big arms, a bigger stomach, and a chubby face. I did not grow much throughout my life and never stretched out, as most kids do when they go through puberty. Standing only five feet tall, there isn't much stretching for my body to do. The one thing that changed was my butt got much larger and I grew breasts.

Throughout my development, there were many thoughts that I had concerning my body and the way others viewed my body. My low amount of self-confidence came at a very young age and has not left. At 21-years-old, there are some things I would like to share with young ladies to help with their developmental journey.

1. Everyone is built differently

Not one person on this planet is the same. Everyone has their own body shape, build, and structure. This is the golden standard for dealing with most issues you might deal with being "overweight." Even though no one is built the same, most things are created with a "one size fits all" mentality that our bodies don't fit in.

2. Call yourself what you'd like

There are many different labels out there for a body that is not your average size. Fat, plus size, overweight, big, thick, heavy, etc. As mentioned, I am quite short and I often refer to myself as being little. I have had multiple people "correct" me and tell me, "You're not little, you're short," as if I can't decide what to call myself.

Whatever you are comfortable with defining yourself as do it. I still call myself little and thick. Find something that you can find confidence in. Don't let other people dictate your own language. After all, we do have freedom of speech.

3. Shopping might be harder

One of the struggles that I have run into as a plus size woman is the lack of selection and realistic pricing on clothing. There are stores that are for plus size women, such as Torrid. I remember my first time stepping into that store and I felt so shocked. I couldn't imagine what it would be like to spend up to $100 on a pair of jeans. This is not an uncommon thing. Clothing stores will charge you more for something that is labeled plus sized. According to some employees that I have discussed this with at various stores, it is because of fabric. But, I have had multiple instances where the straight size (cheaper) pair of jeans will fit but the plus size (more expensive) jeans will not fit, making it not about extra fabric.

The selection of clothing is small and pricey. Be prepared. Shop around and find other stores that might work for you and your budget. If you are looking to splurge on a pair of jeans, then go for Torrid or Maurices. They have great quality clothing, but they are not budget friendly. Walmart, Target (watch the new brand, sizing issues), Meijer, Rue21, Forever 21, Charlotte Russe, and Old Navy all have relatively affordable clothing options as well as the number of options. So if all your friends want to go shopping, look for stores similar to these, that way you don't feel let out.

4. Being overweight does NOT mean you are unhealthy

Too many people have the misconception that being overweight means that you are unhealthy. I have been overweight for almost all of my life and I am an extremely healthy person. As mentioned earlier, everyone is built differently. Your body may change with exercise and dietary changes, but it might not either. Make sure to speak with your doctor about health concerns that you may have and keep track of these issues as well.

Following that, do not let anyone misplace a conversation about your weight. My weight has been mentioned in medical settings where it wasn't appropriate nor necessary. Educate yourself on what your weight MIGHT affect and be prepared. If you feel as though someone is giving you advice about your weight in a situation that isn't necessary, tell them. Do not let people, even medical professionals, body shame you.

5. Make changes because YOU want to

If losing weight is something you would like to do, then please, do it. But if there is one thing that you take from this, please let it be to not let other people dictate what you do. If you are healthy, confident in yourself, and love your body, there is no reason for you to change it (unless you want to). So many people in your life are going to confront you about your weight and encourage you to change it. But nothing is going to be followed through with if it is not something you want to do. Other people have nothing to do with the way your body is.









6. Wear what you want

Being plus size, people try and limit your outfit options. If something catches your eye, wear it. Plus size women look just as good as "straight size" women in the same type of clothing. Crop top? Looks great! High waisted jeans? Rock them! Two-piece bathing suits? Go for it!

Understanding that this type of thing is going to take time to gain confidence in, take it slowly. There are ways to style certain outfits to take steps towards being comfortable with them. For instance, with a two-piece bathing suit, do a darker high waisted bottom with a regular top. This will provide more coverage of your stomach area. This is how I have done it and I love the way it looks. It took me some time to get adjusted to it. For a long time, I would wear my cover up to cover everything. Eventually, that came away. Now, I feel comfortable wearing my bathing suit.












7. Someone finds your body attractive

For the longest time, I thought that a guy was never going to like my body. I was surrounded by all these women who were getting a lot of attention from guys and I wasn't. The only thing I could see was that I looked nothing like them. I looked at myself and didn't think there was anything attractive about me. Once I graduated high school, all of this changed. I received attention from people but not in a positive manner. That didn't matter to me though. To me, this attention was what I thought I deserved.

Never, ever, settle. You will find a person who appreciates your body and you just the way it is (trust me, I found mine too!). You will know when they do because there is no pressure, no ultimatums, no secrecy about being with you, or any questioning it. Make sure to give it time and be aware of what you are looking for as well.

8. Surround yourself with support

Human beings are social creatures. It is essential for there to be forms of interaction, specifically positive interaction. When dealing with an issue such as self-love or positive body image, it is important that there are people that you can have conversations with and receive healthy support from. It does not matter who that person is, whether it's a parent, a boyfriend/girlfriend, a friend, or someone else. It matters that you have an outlet for your feelings about yourself and the changes your body may or may not be going through, along with the way you view yourself.

One form of support that I have recently found is watching Plus Size beauty bloggers/vloggers on YouTube. For me, I have been watching Sarah Rae Vargas, Sometimes Glam, and LearningToBeFearless (I will post their links at the end of this section). Now, this isn't a traditional form of support with it not being face to face. But it has been very helpful for me to see that I am not the only one that is going through self-love and body image issues. It has been helpful to see their clothing choices, where they shop, and how they style outfits.

LearningToBeFearless, RavingsByRae

, Sometimes Glam

9. Say one positive thing about your body a day

Sometimes it might feel as though there are not any positives that you can say about your body. But there is always something. For me, I love my eyebrows. I am very focused on them, take care of them and get them done at least twice a month. I always mention my eyebrows to myself whenever I look in a mirror and I will always raise one eyebrow up, just to show off.








This might seem really silly to some, but it has truly helped me along with this process of learning to love myself. Once I found positives about my eyebrows, it led to finding positives about my eyes and the color of them. Then to my hair. I haven't done much progress from the neck down but I work on it, every day. And if I wasn't doing this "one positive thing a day" about my body, I truly don't think I would make any progress.

10. Remember, you are beautiful!

Though this is a very cheesy line, it is so important. All of us are beautiful human beings, no matter what your size. Do not let size define your beauty. You are so much more than the negatives you see in your body.


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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