All my life, I have been single. Sure, I have had my little flings and flirts but nothing past the point of a second date. And maybe it is just me, but there is some unsaid pity I feel from so many of my friends. I tend to make a lot of friends who seem to always be in some sort of relationship. I have gotten the third-wheel thing down to a science and have learned to keep myself from either sobbing or vomiting as they drone on about all the cute stuff they do. I seem to be cut in half with the dating situation. On one hand, I love being able to flirt or talk to whoever I want. On the other, I really would love someone to be with. But what makes matters worse is all the stupid things single girls hear.
Here is a quick list of things, as a single lady, really gets on my nerves.
1. You can do so much better.
Yes, I can do better than the ass-hat who lead me on. Yes, I can find a nicer guy. But I really don't need to be reminded of how much he hurt me. Also, not to mention this is SUCH a generic line in the girl world of breakups. Like, girl, you aren't even trying at this point. I need you to say something like, "Okay, let's just egg his house."
2. You don't need a man.
Thank you, Captain Obvious. Again, this goes along with the generic thing, but I am also perfectly aware I don't need a man. I have made it this long without one. I, for one, think it is perfectly acceptable to WANT a man. Not to mention, when I usually hear this line, it is coming from the people who have significant others or can't be without one.
3. Just focus on yourself.
Disclaimer: I am all for loving yourself and bettering yourself. But when people say this, they make it seem as if self-improvement stops when you step into a relationship. I believe that everyone should never stop hustling or bettering themselves. In a relationship, you just happen to have an awesome cheerleader.
4. It could be worse.
This statement honestly goes for anything. So many times, people are hurt and others try to tell them they shouldn't be sad because "it could be worse". Through all of my heartbreaks, I realize it could have been way worse. But I deserve the right to be hurt.
5. *Says statement about their own boyfriend*
There have been so many times where I have expressed feelings of wanting a cute date and the other person replies with a story of how well their boyfriend treats them. They may see this as a motivational method but quite honestly, if I am upset, I don't want your stories to be rubbed in my face. Give me ten minutes to cool off and then we can talk about the super cute date you went on.
6. Just get on Tinder! *Later goes on about how dangerous and stupid Tinder is*
Yes, I have Tinder on my phone and know it shouldn't be trusted for relationships. But for some reason, I have so many friends who push me to go meet people in person for something real and then urge me to get on Tinder when I complain about not going on dates. Then when I go on a Tinder date, get f-ed over, and tell them, they tell me how I shouldn't use Tinder. It is honestly just too confusing. Also, don't judge me for my Tinder escapades. Sometimes a girl just wants to have fun.
7. I saw *insert ex-fling's name here* today with another girl.
Cool. Totally sick, bro.
8. Just get your close bros to set you up.
My close guy friends are the reason I don't trust guys. I hear the locker room talk. I am not putting my fate in their hands.
9. What about dating a girl?
Yes, I have contemplated this but am set on my attraction to men. I mean, Zac Efron, come on. Umph.
10. He isn't even that cute. Or cool.
No, not every guy I have liked has been a 10/10. But learning about them made them adorable to me. So what if he had a crooked tooth or a weird pimple? I have extra fat and a large head. I wasn't going out with him because he was cute. I really liked him and his company. As much as he treated me wrong in the end, I don't want to trash all his qualities that I fell head-over-heels for.
I honestly appreciate all the encouragement from all my friends but sometimes, these things don't need to be said. Girl, just let me live my life!