A reflection on gimmicks and tales adults of our childhood preached to us that we now realize are blatant lies.

Of course back then we believed everything they said. No matter how nonsensical it may sound now, the lies our parents and other older people fed us when we were young had us all fooled. Whether it was to eat our vegetables or to stay close to them when we were at the mall, our young, innocent selves were manipulated to listen to whatever it was they were trying to tell us. In fact, I was one of those kids put on a leash until I was five years old because my mom told me she wanted us to "stick together." I now know that it's because one time I ran away from her in Bloomingdales and the whole store went on lockdown... Sorry Mom.

But anyway, the saying goes "kids say the darnest things," but parents apparently say some pretty freaky things, too:

1. You'll stop getting pimples once you’re done with puberty. 
2. "I accidentally walked out of a store with something and my mom told me the police were already waiting for me at the house. So I brought it back in." (Griffin Bertoni '17) 
3. Wine/beer/liquor is an acquired taste.
4. “Dragon flies have the ability to sew your mouth shut if you talk too much… so when I go to sleep on the beach, don’t talk or a dragon fly will get you.” (Anthony Lario ’17) 
5. You can be whatever you want to be when you grow up.
6. "Babies come from vending machines, and you push a button to choose a boy or a girl." (Kate Twombly '16)
7. Santa. 
   • “He won’t come unless you’re sleeping.” (Vasili Tettonis '17) 
   • He's always watching
8. You’ll keep growing! 
9. "If you hold in your pee too long your eyes will turn yellow." (Caroline Guida ’17) 
10. I never would have done that at your age. 
11. “If you pick your nose your finger is going to turn green.” (Kathleen Bohmert ’17) 
12. If you swallow a watermelon seed, a watermelon will grow in your stomach. 
13. “The restaurant doesn’t serve dessert.” (Jack LeBlanc ’17) 
14. “If you lie your nose is going to grow.” (Christina Maltese ’17) 
15. I only focused on my education in college, and I didn't drink until I was 21. 
16. "They told me I was great in the school play then I watched it 10 years later and I sucked... a lot." (Jp Carey '17)
17. "You're the most beautiful girl in the entire world." (Nicolette Weinbaum '16)
18. "I saw my neighbors dog get run over by a truck, and my mom told me they were taking the dog to a 'farm'. It's only when I asked a few months later to see the dog I pieced together what happened." (Jamey Nugent '17)
19. "Your father and I will never get divorced!" (Anonymous)
20. I love you.

Just kidding about the last one. Maybe.