"Generally, the path of least resistance appeals. Also, I am superb at parallel parking." -actual Tinder bio

When my sisters told me to try Tinder, my immediate response was no. 

Call me old-fashioned, but I’d rather get to know someone in person. There’s something about a smile and laugh that doesn’t translate on a phone screen, and why take the fun out of dating, anyway? What ever happened to a dinner and movie? Or at the very least, a function date and t-shirt?    

After some pleading, I finally gave in, constructed my profile, and set my preferences.  

Pictures? I used some tailgating pics.

Bio? No need to get fancy, just chapter letters.

Distance limit? Why would anyone care about meeting someone 30 miles away?

Age? Yeah, not looking for freshmen or old men. My dad would kill them, anyway.    

After dragging my feet for long enough, I jumped into the jungle that is Columbia-based Tinder. Right off the bat, I was surprised at how bad USC guys are at taking pictures of themselves. After swiping left on the first hundred profiles or so, I realized that guys can be sorted into different categories based on their pic style.

First, there are the guys who stubbornly cling to the idea that selfies are a good idea. Unless you’re out somewhere cool with friends, I’m not impressed by it, especially if you’re shirtless in your bathroom. Insert duck face here.

Second, there are the frat bros. Besides the fact that I can’t tell which bro you are, I’m also not excited by the idea that all you ever do is drink and smoke cigars. 

Third, there are football or baseball players. Swipe right, always.  

Also fascinating were the bios. Some guys tried to play it straight, and others tried to be funny with pick-up lines. Michael Scott quote? Swipe right. Emojis that tell me you’re a pothead? Swipe left. Blatantly say all you’re interested in is hooking up? Points for honesty, but swipe left.  

Lastly, the conversations were worth the initial awkwardness. My favorite pick-up line came from James, who wrote, "I was going to give you a corny line to show you my humor but I'm a little tired so let's pretend I just told you a pretty lame but admirable attempt at a pick up line and you are now alittle smitten with me ;) ....annnnnd go!" 

Some of the conversations were funny, and others were too awkward to ever bring up again. All in all, my Tinder experience was just okay- I probably won't be getting on again soon, but at least now I can say I took part in something that'll be on a throwback Buzzfeed list ten years from now.