45 Questions For Newberry College
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Student Life

45 Questions For Newberry College

Hail the Scarlet and the what?

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45 Questions For Newberry College
KT

When you pick a college or university, you know that there are pros and cons to whichever school you attend. Newberry College is no different; it has its pros and cons. And some things about this school are just nothing but questionable. So on behalf of all the Wolves (or Indians) out there- here are 45 questions for Newberry College.

1. Where did the Smeltzer cats even come from?

2. Why does the Hotbox have to be so hot? All the time? Even in winter?

3. Who decided to call our dining hall/cafeteria/dining service the 'caf?'

4. Why are we forced to attend copious amounts of FALs?

5. Why can't there be more fun FALs? Dance parties help educate our social side.

6. Is Brokaw ever actually going to be demolished?

7. Is the new "Walker II" dorm ever going to begin construction?

8. What is this "Wifi" thing and how do I get it?

9. Why is the world's largest graveyard RIGHT there?

10. Moreover- why is the baseball field at the end of a nice little stroll through said graveyard?

11. Why do they have outdoor tables if you get locked out EVERY TIME you go sit outside at the caf?

12. Why do the "Indians" hate the "Wolves" so much? We didn't change the mascot, people!

13. Why do the cheerleaders stand behind the basket at basketball games? Every. Single. Time. someone almost gets pegged or tackled.

14. Why is our football team so unnecessarily big?

15. Why are 2/3 of the frat houses 10+ minutes away in the woods somewhere?

16. Why don't sororities have houses at all?

17. Who gets to vote on the cereal in the caf?

18. WHY CAN'T WE JUST KEEP LUCKY CHARMS?

19. What is up with the printers in the library...19b. and why is one or more always broken?

20. Why do we have old and new core?

21. Why don't we just cancel classes from 9am-12pm when we have convocation?

22. What's going on with certain dorms being hella hot while others are hella cold?

23. Who is going to save Dopey's???

24. Who decided "Rah Rah Newberry" was motivational enough to be lyrics in a fight song?

25. What will happen if Pastor Ernie doesn't wear red shoes?

26. What really happens if you walk under the bell tower?

27. Who was the first person to ride the wolf? (Can we thank them?)

28. Why couldn't we have Chick-fil-a AND keep Subway???

29. WHY is the COFFEE SHOP on campus open at NIGHT and not in THE MORNING?

30. Why is Walker the only dorm on campus with an elevator?

31. Why is there always an ambulance screeching through campus?

32. Also- why is there ALWAYS a train blowing its horn when you're trying to sleep in the middle of the night?

33. How did we survive before admin decided not to let students sit on the first bleacher of Eleazer?

34. Why do you have to hike up a god-awful hill to go to Financial Aid, which you usually go to for a god-awful reason already?

35. How do Derrick residents sleep when you can hear every step everyone takes?

36. Do the Oakland Mills residents even exist or are they a myth they tell on-campus students?

37. What the hell is up with the random bell-song-thing that happens like 10 minutes before certain hour strikes?

38. Why does the caf serve alllllll the best food on one day?

39. Why must information spread so quickly? I mean it's a small school but GEEZ.

40. Why is Walker a dry dorm when most everyone is an upperclassman?

41. Who decided Cromer was a "step up" from Brokaw?

42. Were there any other trees we could have planted on Bachman Court that didn't smell like a dead body?

43. Is the third floor of Smeltzer ACTUALLY haunted?

44. Why is 50% of Brokaw's parking lot for professors when there are hundreds of students ~living. in. Brokaw.~?

45. Do I ever have to leave?

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