As one of two awkward white girls on my cheerleading squad in high school, I either had to learn how to dance or be forced to become more actively involved with my schoolwork. Naturally, I chose the former.

After many, (and I mean many) nights staying up late and practicing routines, I learned that I am slightly capable of dancing. It also helps that I am a music major and I HAVE to feel rhythm and beat. If you have zero sense of rhythm or beat, I’m sorry, and I will try to post something down the line that will give you a few tips in a topic more relatable to you.

After an amazing weekend of dancing and having fun, I found myself asking my friends who could dance very well if I had any skills on the dance floor. When I received a few enthusiastic responses that I could indeed hang with the pros (repeat “hang with” not: show anyone up, or make a lasting impression on the floor) I decided to dedicate this post to those who need a little help with their dance floor etiquette. So here we go.

ONE - If you have NO confidence or the ability to laugh at yourself whatsoever, you probably shouldn’t dance. You’d probably be happier at the bar, or standing along the wall like all the rest of the people who are taking a break, scoping out the girls/guys, or who can’t dance either. 

TWO - Relax. Chances are that you’ve come to the club to hang out with friends or a significant other who will not judge you (other than probably a few small but friendly insults). Not to mention, anyone new who would see you there will never see you again. Even if you do make an idiot out of yourself, it’s not like you have to explain yourself the next day! You will forever be known to them as that crazy guy/girl dancing like a fool at the club of course, but nine times out of ten, how you dance does not get back to your job, family, school, etc. 

THREE - When on the dance floor, group yourself with people who dance really well. You may learn a thing or two, or maybe take on their care-free dancin’ spirit! BUT if something happens where the group you’re dancing with shifts, try not to let it look like you’re freaking out…a.k.a. AAH NOW I HAVE NO ONE TO DANCE WITH AND I LOOK LIKE A LOSER. I know it’s not a good feeling to be dancing by yourself, but look confident. Finish doing a few moves and notice another group of friends you can dance with or maybe someone of the opposite sex if you feel up to it. Whatever you do, remain calm. Remember, no one wants to look stupid, so 90% of the time there’s someone else looking for someone to dance with too. 

FOUR - ALWAYS have a good face. If there is one thing I have learned that works best, it's keeping a confident face. Even if you suck, ACT like you have never made a mistake in your life. Not sure how to keep a confident face? Make a face that you see in a popular music video while the dancers are dancing. Remember that at the end of the day, dancing is a form of EXPRESSION. Make expressions with your face that match your body movements to feel confident. 

Once, I went to a club with a cage above the dance floor. The cage spun around so fast, that as much as I wanted to do it, I knew I would involuntarily ralph everywhere if I tried, but this girl went up there dressed hot as hell… and then FELL. OUT. OF. THE. CAGE. This was a twenty-foot drop… You would think that this would have been the end of her night, but sure as I am typing here, this girl got up, brushed herself off, MAINTAINED her confident face, proceeded to look like a goddess, and did it all over again. SWEAR TO YOU, at the end of the night, NOBODY was talking about her 20 ft. fall, they were talking about how gorgeous she was and how she got right back up and did it all again. THAT is sexy confidence. So if that girl can fall from 20ft. and pull off the smoothest recovery I’ve ever witnessed in my life, I am fairly confident you can pretend to be confident on the dance floor. When I make confident/goofy faces people think one of three things “That girl can’t dance but she looks like she’s having fun,” “Wow, that girl can dance,” or the ever-favorite “Ohkaye…I see you.”

FIVE - Don’t be afraid to revert back to the classics. Use all your old moves. You never know when a nice little “dougie” will fit in to a dance. Call me crazy, but I often find myself “lean with it rock with it”ing when I’m feeling confident. Don’t hate the oldies. 

SIX - If all else fails, sing the lyrics to the song and sway to the beat with some type of expression in your body. So maybe you can’t dance, but at least we know you don’t live under a rock and that you really have heard this song before. 

**Just a slight disclaimer- For all the guys out there, I realize how hard it can be for some of you to go to the club or a party and be a confident dancer. I have tried to provide tips that are unisex, but let’s admit it, us girls have it easy. If we can shake our butts, we get by on the dance floor. Guys have it so much worse…you actually have to have some individual moves here and there for when you’re not dancing with a girl. (And I mean dancing with a girl, not swaying your hips ever so slightly and calling it “grinding." You’re not fooling anybody.) Yes, you have it a lot harder, but just so you know, going out there and looking silly is better than any guy standing on the wall.